A Relationship Prayer

 Dear Daddy,

          I know every couple has their own situations. I know I might be an expectation because I blame myself but why is it the guys in certain relationships. Really, I am not blaming a certain side because anyone can mess up. That is our human nature. Why is it up to the other side to be the strong ones? Why do I notice more things like these things? Why do I care more about these kinds of relationships? Why is it hard for guys to care and stand up for the ones they say they love? What about the children if they have some? I am here for a purpose for women if I can see these many in my life right now. I can see more of them because I have had my heart broken. Might not be in the same way or with the same situations but it is still hard just in a different way. Are You (God) trying to tell me something before I make a mistake with my future husband right now in my life?


In Jesus' Name,


Amen

Jesus is The Bread of Life

           This is the sermon that was during church this morning. It made a lot of sense when it was put in a simple way.


John 6:22-55   

-Believes=trust, lean on, cling, rely on
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 "Bread of Life is a person (aka Jesus)."

"God is there when you NEED him."

"Receive the Word of God, eat it like bread."

"Ingest Christ."

"Eat God spiritually."
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John 1:14 New International Version (NIV)

14 The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

John 6:31-33 New International Version (NIV)

31 Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written: ‘He gave them bread from heaven to eat.’[a]”

³² Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven.³³ For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

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John 1:17 New International Version (NIV)

17 For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.

John 6:60 New International Version (NIV)

60 On hearing it, many of his disciples said, “This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?”

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            The verses I have put above are some of the verses that was given throughout the sermon this morning. The reason I have made the words "grace and truth"  bold and italics is because YOU NEED TO HAVE TRUTH WITH THE GRACE. Most people just want the grace without the truth. They want to receive it but they don't want the truth that comes along with it because it is too hard to understand it and take it in. That is where the last verse that I put up comes in.
            But yet, I want to spend time on the verses 31-33 in chapter 6. That is what got to me the most because I love the way the preacher explained it, especially since he used food to compare it to. It mentioned "manna and bread" in those verses.  Manna is like the Living Bread in the Old Testament. It is a forwards to what was coming in the New Testament with Christ on the Cross for our sins. The manna was given to the Israelites when they were coming out of Egypt to have them stay alive during their waiting period in the desert. Here is the comparison between Manna in the Old Testament and Jesus in the New Testament:


Manna:

-Small
-Round
-White
-Given at night
-Misunderstood/people didn't know what it was
-They had sufficient amounts of it.
-Sweet to the taste
-Passed on to others


Now here is Jesus:

-Humble
-Enteral Life
-Came into a dark world
-Misunderstood as the Savior of the world
-He is sufficient for us.
-Sweet to the taste
-We should pass on the Good News about Him to others.

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          Can you make the comparison between the two? Can you match up the same thing like small and humble? See the comparison? Jesus is the Bread of Life. Our Bread of Life. 


The Bread of Life that keeps us living!

5 Years and On

           It has been forever since I have actually wrote an entry about my life. I have been so busy with family and work that I just haven't found the time to write anything but now this Friday night I have found time. I have time to relax and write, which I need a lot of because things have just been stressful for me lately and I am talking about my whole life, not just certain parts of it. I know this entry is a little late because I should have wrote it at the start of this month, when I actually started this blog but instead I am writing it at the end.
           This entry won't be one of my touchy ones because it is just about how I have been writing in this blog for 5 years now, counting this year. It is funny because a lot has changed in those 5 years and they just keep changing. My life is still going and I have no idea where it is going to end up at. It is not going to end up like I planned it though in college, I can tell you that right now. Nothing has been going my way especially this year. I always like to look back at my blog anniversary and see what my year in my blog has been like. Honestly, though, I have no idea what this year (April to April) has been like.
           This have been so crazy it seems. I know I was working at Adventure Club and now I am working at a preschool at a public school. Has it really been a year since I have figured out how to handle my anxiety too? I met a lot of new people throughout that year, mainly teenagers and children since my friend started being a foster mom. I can't even remember the Bible Studies that I have been through. I know I tried to go through the Bible Study "Proven" by Jennie Allen but didn't finish it because I started subbing at the preschool in November. I also study the book "The Grave Robber" in my Wednesday night Bible Study Group and I did finish that one. I feel like we did another study but I forgot it.
            It just seems like things are happening a lot faster now then they use to. I know I have grown up a lot too but that is so much to explain. You would just have to go back and read all of the entries to see that progress. Anyways, I am not trying to look back at the past but look forwards to the future and what I will be writing about from now on and how often too. I don't think I will be writing has often because I don't have the part time job like I use to have and this job takes a lot more planning time at home that I need to focus on. I also won't have that friendship. relationship kind of entries because it just isn't there for me anymore.
           If anything, it will be a lot more spiritual growth entries and entries about family because that is what I think I am going to be focusing on from now on unless things change for the better. I guess you would say. I also want to do more poems if I am able. I can't say much about my job for reasons I can't say so that deletes some of my entries too. Does all this make sense? I am giving my readers an idea of what is ahead in this blog for the next year, I guess. I will probably be doing most of my writing on the weekends now too since I now work a full time job. You can stay around or you can stop reading this. It is up to you. I won't be offended either way. 
             I just hope that this blog year will be just as interesting as my last. Believe me, if it keeps going like this month has been going, it will defiantly be that way. You will want to follow the Quest that I am on with God because it is everything but short of His Goodness and Grace. I have no idea where I will be by this time in April of 2019 but that is the mystery of our God. Isn't it?

Isaiah 55:6,8-13

Isaiah 55:6 New International Version (NIV)

6 Seek the Lord while he may be found;
    call on him while he is near.

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Isaiah 55:8-13

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
    come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
    without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
    so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
    It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
    and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
12 You will go out in joy
    and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
    will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
    will clap their hands.
13 Instead of the thorn bush will grow the juniper,
    and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord’s renown,
    for an everlasting sign,
    that will endure forever.”

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Beautiful Place-A Poem

"Sin is always turning relationship into performance."-David English
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"God gives a beautiful space to cultivate relationship."-Justin R.

           I was just going to do a positive poem about a beautiful place but now that I think about it and what I have been through lately, I am going to write a bad to good poem. It will kind of be a romantic one or at least it will be to me.
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Beautiful Place-A Poem 

What is a Beautiful Place?
To a lot of people, it has
flowers, sunshine, warm
temperatures, and really
bright day with a lot of
happy and welcoming
people. I am going to talk
about a different beautiful
place. A place where nothing
is perfect and right.

A beautiful place doesn't
have to be all those pretty
things. It can be a place of
hardships and confusion
and just not knowing anything.
It can also be a place of
hurting for longer then you
thought and more painful
then you thought too. That
beautiful place can be very
insignificant at times too.

It doesn't have to be important
at all. It can be a place where
everything is laid out on the floor
in plies and plies for you just
waiting to get an answer. It could
also be dirty dishes in the sink
waiting to be washed. It could
also be dark outside all the time
until there is some light that finally
gets in.

It is great to have those beautiful
places like I mentioned at the start
of this poem. It is so much easier to
have the flowers, sunshine, warm
temperatures, happy and welcoming
people but it doesn't have to have
that. In fact, if it those have all of
those things, how can we grow as
a person. We would just expect to
be happy all the time and that could
be bead for our well being.

It is in those hard moments and
places that it is really beautiful.
That we are really beautiful because
it is those moments that really
bring out the best in us. It is those
times that people can see who we
really are and what we really believe
in. It is in those messy moments that
God uses to show people who He
really is.

How can you see God in the really
beautiful times in people's life? You
really can't. You see Him in the worse
times when a person is holding on to
everything they have. Giving up
things that they really don't want to
but knows it is the right thing to do.
Seeing God in those hard time is really
a beautiful thing because it give you
love, hope, peace, and understanding.

So let people see you at your worst
places because those are the most
beautiful to them and to God. They
can learn more from them then from
anything else that they try.



Written By: Tiffney Wilson

Written On: April 18th, 2018

A Caring Prayer

Dear Daddy,

         I am having a hard time I will admit. With all my heart, I want to do what is right and not be selfish towards other people. I want my friends to be happy in life too. Their own life and if that doesn't involve me then I should be fine with it. It has been more then a month and I just realized it this week. I still wanna be but is it really worth my time? I know I prayed earlier for a clean heart this month and I want that to continue that prayer. Not sure what that looks like for me or other people yet and if they even be in my life once all clean. Even to move on, everyone needs to be cleaned of the past. Daddy, You know how hard that is for me to say and You are the Only one that knows it hurts me. Right now, though, I am looking every way and to every path because I don't know what to do. On the outside, I am always the strong girl even though this whole thing. I've just been so busy that I hide them lately. When I calm down enough, will I really be okay with things? Will I understand why and why me and why now?


In Christ's name,

Amen

Cotton Balls and Dishes

         When did life get so hard? Where did the simplicity go? Simplicity like cotton balls (aka pom pom balls) and dishes. Trying to figure out how and what colors go where and together is the game. I asked the teacher that was working with me those two questions at the top. She responded with "when iPads entered the world." Sadly, that's true.
           They might not be able to match the colors like they are suppose to. That's okay though. Some children just have fun putting them in and getting them out. The simple and easiest way. It was so neat to see that. It calmed 3 of the wildest children down. Amazing how that happens! To make a point between USA children and international children, these two children I am talking about were international children.
             The children were running around until I got them out. Then, they sat down at the table and started playing with them. They played with them for about 15 minutes. This is how I see the two things that the children were playing with and relating them to life. The cotton balls are life's problems and the bowls and cups are the bigger picture of life.
              Sometimes we get so caught up on the cotton balls and matching them in the right colored bowls that we get so stressed in life. We should do what these 2 children did. We should not worry about life's problems and just live life. We should look at the bigger picture instead of the little cotton balls. When we make it a bigger focus that is easy but when we have to get everything right on our own, then we might as well forget about having fun in life.
             Yes, things will get messed up and in different colored bowls but that is when we pick stay in that bowl for a little bit, learn the lesson God has for us there, and then get back up again and try to do it God's Way. He knows what is best for us anyways. But just has those children learning their colors, we need to learn how to deal with certain situations in life. When we get in the same situation later on down the road, then we will know what to do and how to react to it.
               When you look at the little things like cotton balls and dishes and think about the bigger picture, it is kind of fun because it makes life more interesting. Right? You can tell that I am a child at heart if something like that teaches me an adult lesson.

Change of Heart

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."
Psalm 51:10

"You can't change what's going on around you until you change what's going on within you."-Brothers in Christ Outdoors
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         I love that verse and the saying. I think they go together perfectly. I saw the verse on a friend's email and thought about praying it. I prayed that verse over my friend and me. I can't say much about my friend because I don't know much but I know for me it is what I need.
          I need to get rid of the old and start clean again. I need God to give me a steadfast spirit of Him in me. I need to be happy where He is leading me and focusing on that. If I want to change anything around me, I need to have a renewed spirit in me. I can't take care of things if I don't take care of myself. That is a lesson I have to learn everyday.
           I have a heart for caring about other people eapically children but it can't be about them all the time. It also goes along with feelings. I can't change how I feel about something or someone if I don't change what is going on in my mind and heart. If I have the addtiude of I want it now, then that is what is going to come out in my actions. Yet, if I expect a person to change or treat me differently, then maybe I should treat them differently too.
          I need that spirit of peace. Clean all of the bad things out so I can fellow God in peace and know I am doing it right. I feel like I am repeating myself a lot but it is hard to explain when you can't tell about the situation. I just know that I did pray about having a clean heart and that is what I want. I even prayed that prayer for others too. It is like you want all the old junk and memories out so you can start anew.
           I will also say for a relationship/crush, it is like you want everything that has happened in the past to be gone. You want to start again as friends and stay that way. I will say that was some of the prayer I prayed last night. I want a clean heart in me yet a peaceful spirit where I know friends are what we are suppose to be. I also know that I can't expect that from the other side until I change on the inside too.
           Maybe that's why I got my hair dyed a different color? Not really, I was thinking about it way before all this came up. Yet I have had another friend say that if you change something on the outside, it means you are changing on the inside. Not the first time I've changed my hair because of a situation in my life. I've done it a year after my grandma passed away.
          All this to say that I do need to change my heart and things inside me before I can move on in life. Might be a long journey but I am ready for it!