Going On My 8th Year in AR

           You know what hit me during church tonight while listening to the sermon? The fact that I have now started my 8th year here in AR. Wow! I can't believe I have stayed that long in the same state. The state where I thought I never would go in my life. The home of Wal Mart that seemed so far off from visiting. The state that got a bad say because President Clinton was from it. Yes, those were my thoughts before I moved to AR, I admit, but now I love this place.
           This past year has been different in its own ways and it kept getting better. It just seems like the longer I stay in AR, the better it gets. Every year has its own special and unique things and lessons. I started a new job back in September and it has just grown me and made an impact on me. It is where I want to be and what I want to do. It was fun when I started but now it is challenging, which I love. This job has also helped me to remember what it was like to have a job that I like and am good at. It is reminding me of what it is like to have people encourage you and that see your strengths, not just your weaknesses. It has been taking all the negativity away from my life and I love that. When you hear people put you down in your career and/or job for 2 years in a row, it is nice to work for someone that can and will believe in you as a person.
             I have also been exploring my health a bit more and making changing in that. I have start Plexus again, which does work but since I am only getting paid part time I am looking into cheaper ways like hotlics ways. I am also looking into and thinking more about how what I am feeling has to do with gut health and nothing about my brain.  I have stopped taking meds. completely and for now am on Plexus. Going through all of that has made me realize that I need to have a more healthy and natural out look on life. Use what is around me for life. Not just to make something else and hope it goes away for a little bit but keep it away forever. I stopped taking the meds. because I got a new dr. around March and I really didn't agree with his ways of doing things plus I just didn't feel comfortable around him so I stopped going in for the meds. Taking back control of my own body is a great feeling that I didn't remember having before the meds or even during them.
               Now with my spiritual life. I feel like I have relearned a lot of things since I have been off my anxiety meds. My church just got done with a series on the Fruit of the Spirit that I really loved and understood. It was totally a different view on each of the Fruits. Very easy to understand. I did stop volunteering at the church because I just felt like it was taking up too much of my time plus I felt like I was just there babysitting and I wanted to do more. I stopped that in May of this year. I joined a small group last Fall that was made out of older and wiser adults. They were like my mom age or older but I felt comfortable with them so I kept going and I joined because the women that kind of ran the children's ministry knew me and invited me. That was my small group for the Fall.
                Then, I started a small Bible study at the church in Jan. called "Experiencing God" and I really liked it. I would take it again. I liked it that much. It was through that Bible Study that I realized how I could start to tell what God was doing in my life and for what reasons. The more and more I keep thinking about the study and what I learned there, the more and more things make sense. It was an intense Bible study but a good one.
                 I had something else special to add on to this entry and that is because of my friend. Starting this past December, she became a single foster parent and had the same kids up til now. I got to hang out with her and the children a lot and it has been fun. Seeing what a foster parent actually does has been a big learning process for me and made me appicate her and other foster parents out there. I would go to the parks, farmer's markets, the children's museum, and church and eating out afterwards with them. I even got to be apart of one of the little boys' 2nd birthday party. This thing would have to be the best and number one thing out of my 7th year in AR. It also showed me that I don't have to work somewhere like shelter to help those kinds of children if I have people in my life that I could hang with and help out.
             You know? One more thing that was different about this year was two of my friends got married in the same year. That taught me a lot about me and what to look for in a marriage and/or life. Being in the middle of their talks and seeing what they have and what I don't. Seeing the advantages and disadvantages. Like, yes, you have that person that will always love you right beside you but yet you have to share a bathroom. You have to think about the size of house you want. You have to get rid of some of your own things by having a garage sale or another way. Then after you are married and even before like in the engagement stage, you have to think about when you are going to start trying to have kids and how. I know this might be a little much but I guess this past year, I have learned more about what a marriage is then what I want it to be if you know what I mean. I kind of get to hear and learn form other people's mistakes before I get married, which really only makes my marriage someday twice, if not more, better.
             Some goals for my 8th year in AR are these: might want to be a site supervisor at my job (not quite sure yet will see how this school year goes), have deeper relationships/friendships, become a lot more healthier, get rid of my anxiety for good, and maybe involved in church in another way once I have had a long enough break. Then there is also the dream or goal of finding that person and getting married.