A Child Seeking God's Attention

            We are like children seeking for God's attention. This is the theme I felt like God has been teaching me this past week with my little girl. She is so self-seeking and she takes everything you say for real. There is no maybe with her. It is a yes or a no so you have to be careful what you say to her. She also as a really good memory. I can't tell the whole story of her and what has happened but I can say that she needs all the attention she can get. She can go to this joyful, little girl to one throwing a big fit in no time at all if you don't give just her the attention. I noticed this espically at the end of the week when we got another new little girl.
          The 1st little girl had the bedroom and me rocking and reading to her and only her for a week or more and then here comes another little girl. The first night with the two girls were really hard for me because they are both in for not getting enough attention and knowing my heart that is all I want to do is give them both attention but it is hard because I can't rock them both at the same time or things like that. The 1st little girl showed some bad jealousness and untrust towards me when I had to take care of the other little girl. She doubted me when I said I was going to do this and that. She would not let me even pat her back and she would not lay down easy for me. She wanted things her way because that is what she was use to. She didn't like her new friend because she was taking all the attention to her. It just broke my heart to see how one child could go to trusting someone for a week and be happy to a I don't like you anymore addtiude for a night when she wanted someone to sleep with the first night because she was scared of being by herself. She would even hide things from me the day our new friend got there because she didn't want me to take them.
           Then it got me thinking on the way home after everything that night, isn't that how we are with God? Don't we say God you got this thing. I trust You with it. Then we take it back days later because we want to have control because we are scared it won't turn out right. We get jealous of other people getting there faster then we do. We lose focus on what really matters in life. We seek attention from the things of this world instead of focusing on God like we should. Don't we doubt God and ask for another sign when He has given us a clear one? We don't trust Him like we should.  He says He will do this and that but we ask again and again just to make sure. We take things into our own hands because we know how it will turn out if we handle it but if we give it to God we have no idea. We are scared of what is going to come next. Don't you think these children are too? We hide things from God because we don't want Him to have control of it. We are like children throwing a HUGE fit when we take our eyes of God.
            Our Daddy still Loves Us though. He will never leave us like some of this parents have left their child. He loved us enough to die for us on the cross. He loved us with an "Apage" Love that we should love other people with around us. I will admit I have been in a hug fit lately with God and seeing it from a child's point of view and seeing how "dumb" (lack of a better word) it is espically towards God who cares about us and who we are His children. I saw so many "sins" in my life in that girl's life. She can't help it yet but I can.  Jealously, doubt, not trusting God, wanting the control, fear, and so much more. Where is that peace and love that we should have when God is in our lives?
            It was strange because I was like the "God" firgure to this little girl and I was letting her down because I had another little girl to help out or that is what she thought because that she what she knows. All she knows. We seek God's attention so much by doing so many "good" things but we don't need to do that. He loves us like we are His child. Nothing we can do will take us away from Him. He is always with us in the good and the bad. In everything we do and say. He should be at least. We run after His attention more then we should because really it is right there within us but we don't see it because some days or months we chose not to see it. Sad.
            I was asking God that night in that room, "God, am I like this little girl? Am I jealous, untrusting, doubting, fearing You? Should I be?" I wanted to help that little girl so bad come to the realization that I care for the both of them. You know what the funny thing was that I did after the other girl went to sleep. I picked up the girl that was doubting and mad at me and took her in my arms and just rocked her to sleep. I gave her that safe feeling, hopefully, that no matter what happens I'm here for you. I stayed late that night to get her to sleep and some days God has to stay late too to show us what He wants to show us.
            I really couldn't ask for a better job unless it was overseas doing this same thing. :) I hope the people that read this will understand what I am trying to get across. I think I explained it the best I could.