Simple Prayers Being Answered in a Big Way

        Lately the sentence/title "Simple Prayers Being Answered in a Big Way" has been hitting me pretty hard.  I've been experiencing God in some strange ways lately through other people's lives. It is funny how we say a simple prayer at the end of a long prayer and that simple prayer is the one that gets answered. We don't expect the little one to get answered because it is one that we usually throw on at the end just for safe keeping and maybe even to wrap up what the bigger one is saying. Sometimes you also wonder why you are praying that little pray when really nothing big is happening. Yeah, little things might be happening like keeping people safe on the way to and from somewhere but we usually see that as an every day chance. 

         We see that as a chance but when you see that something bigger has been answered then there aren't such things as chances anymore when you are praying that certain end prayer. The prayer or request that I usually do especially for my family and friends is this one: "Please keep them safe." Sometimes it is just that or sometimes if something certain is happening I will add on to the end of that with the certain something. I will admit that with this friend that I have kept praying for for about 5 years now. That was my usually way of ending the prayers. It started off because it was something nice to say and everyone needs to be safe. 

          Then as the years went on and as I was seeing the difference it was making in my friend's life, the more I was praying it because I wanted it to be true in my friend's life. I wanted my friend to be safe. I'll admit to that I've seen and heard dangerous things in my friend's field/career that happened and there is no way I would forgive myself if it ever happened to my friend. It is like the more I live life and the more I pay attention, the more that request really mean something to me when I pray for that friend. I'm using this friend as an example because something big and scary just happen in their life that we both saw God in and I will never say a prayer for the friend without saying that simple prayer ever again. 

           It was like God showing me in the worst way possible but in a good way at the same time that those simple prayers can have a big answer. You might keep praying them and think nothing is going to happen and it is no good to pray that simple prayer but you are wrong. You never know when a person needs to be safe from something and how bad that something really is. It was also another way of telling me not to give up. 

           I won't say much about the situation because I don't want to put my friend on the spot that much. I will say, though, my friend did make a video of what really happened when they got shot at and it made tears come to my eyes. Now my friend doesn't know that yet. I think those tears were tears of joy because it should have been a lot worse but God was in every step of the way. God was directly talking to my friend. My friend did things very unusual that night and know my friend knows why. My friend was experiencing God at work in that moment of their life. With two wild dogs coming after my friend and two bullets actually zipped by his head, it is a miracle my friend is still alive in some ways. 

           I will also say this in the video my friend made, my friend couldn't even talked about it without that scary and shaky voice and this video was made a few days after if not the day after. If a person talks like that after something that big happened, you know it was really, really, really scary for that person. I couldn't even think how scary it was or I would start to cry and have throughout these past few days. My friend even said in the video that he couldn't even sleep at night in his own house on his on land where he should feel really safe. It was hard for him to go to sleep after that. The thoughts were just bothering him and still are. They are still working on the whole case to see if they can find what was going on that night. 

          I just keep thinking how amazing it was to see God in everything even in the video my friend made. The video just made it rock solid that God was there with him and that even the simple prayers that people pray can be answered in a big way no matter how long it takes you to see the answer to those simple prayers. God will make something happen. I know I can say this about me. sadly, sometimes it takes the hardest things to remove my stubborn view out of sight. I'm glad God is removing my stubbornness while I am single right now.

          I will be honest before the video came out about the whole thing, I was thinking about the what ifs and what's next. I can honestly tell you I don't know how I would  have reacted if things didn't go the way they did since losing the people I can about is my worst nightmare. God was in every little step, answering every little prayer that has been and will been prayed for him. 

God's Movement = Blessings

Genesis 1:27-28New International Version (NIV)

27 So God created mankind in his own image,
    in the image of God he created them;
    male and female he created them.

28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earthand subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     
        When God first created the earth, He meant for it to bless us. He meant for it to bring about goodness in every way. He meant for it to bring us promises and empower our good. He wants us to cultivate the earth and bring it to Him. Cultivate it by planting plants and taking care of the animals that He put here on the earth.

     
       "The mission of God is to extend His blessing and glory to all the earth through mankind."-Nick Roland-Pastor

        The two songs that we sung during this sermon was "You're a Good, Good Father" and "God, We Stand in Amazement". Creation was Movement 1 and then Movement 2 was the Curse. It is in Genesis 3:6-14. The marriage between Adam and Eve fell apart. Adam wanted her to die. In the first 3 chapters of Genesis, God was in control with everything. But then the Fall happened, that is when we took the control over our own lives.
        Then in chapter 12 in Genesis that is where God talks about Grace.

Genesis 12New International Version (NIV)

The Call of Abram

12 The Lord had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.

2 “I will make you into a great nation,
    and I will bless you;
I will make your name great,
    and you will be a blessing.[a]
3 I will bless those who bless you,
    and whoever curses you I will curse;
and all peoples on earth
    will be blessed through you.”

       God's blessing on Abram and Sarah was to help the human race get back on track. He said to Abram, "that God will bless the nations through him". That was the Grace part of God.  He trusts us to start all over again. He trusts us enough again to bless Abram and bless the human race through him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Galatians 3:8-9New International Version (NIV)

8 Scripture foresaw that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, and announced the gospel in advance to Abraham: “All nations will be blessed through you.”[a] 9 So those who rely on faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith.       

My Worst Nightmare

         Sometimes people ask you "what is your worst nightmare?" Before yesterday, I would have said "I don't know" or I would randomly say something without even thinking. That all changed when a situation happened earlier this week that I just found out about yesterday. I've thought about it too and it would have to be it. Sorry if this scares you but isn't this a nightmare to most of us anyways.
           My worst nightmare is that someone I love and/or care about deeply gets shot at. You never think about that until it almost happens to a person you know. I won't say much about the situation because I don't know much yet. I'll be honest, though, I stayed awake thinking about this whole thing when I heard the news. My anxiety also went up to 150% when I heard. I'm not the person who needs to know these things. I'm already a person that cares deeply for other people so I am already worried about the little things so hearing things like this makes it much worse for me.
            I stayed awake for a hour almost talking to God and playing the what ifs in my head even though I was trying not to. Couldn't help it though. I woke up this morning and went straight to that thought and back to thinking about it. I had to go get some coffee before work. The coffee would keep me up and keep me busy at other things so I didn't have to think about it. Because my mind wasn't thinking straight, my coffee spilled in my car and on me on the way to work. What a way to start a morning right?!?
         I'll admit too that I thought about my family,while laying in bed, last night too. It is sad that you have to think about that but with today's world you do. I have such a diverse family that it is something to be thought of. I love everyone in my family and if something happened to them, I would be hunting that person or people down too. Don't think I don't want to do the same thing to the person in the situation that I heard of now. You don't come near anyone that I know.
         But being like Christ, I know I can't do that. I can't really have feelings like that either. At the same time, though, we are all human and you would be lying if you said you haven't thought thoughts like that before. It is in our nature to response that way but we need to be trained in responding like Christ would. That would be really hard for me. I will tell you that now.
         You really don't know what your worst nightmare is until you see or hear it has happened to the people you care about. Another sign could be until you admit it out loud to the person that it happened to, no matter what they might think. I will say that I let this person know that I was concern for them. That is just in my nature. If you know me, you know that. I just have this need, too, that I need to hear or see that this person is alright.
         It brought me to humbleness again in a lot of ways. I will write about those ways in the next few entries I write. One way is that it taught me that everyone has a worst nightmare and it can happen too. We don't need to take life for granted at all. You need to live out our dream and leave something behind, whether it is our character, passion, or material things or all three. I know this person would have done that. This person is living out the dream and would have left great memories and things behind.

        Some things to think about are: 

"Why do we just sit around not doing anything, when we aren't promised tomorrow?"

"Why do we wait and take the next step in our lives if we aren't promised tomorrow?"

 "We have to be following God's plans for us, all the way, even if there are things we are uncertain of but feels like God is calling us to do. We don't know what will happen next."

I will say, too, that the older you get the more your worst nightmare might change because you understand how life works better and better and it also depends on the stage of life you are in. 

          

           Will you think about these things during your life?

A Prayer From the Book "Uninvited"

"I'm not who that guy says I am. I'm not who the girl says I am.
I'm not who social media likes and comments say I am.
I'm not who the grades, to-do lists, messes, and mess ups say I am.
I'm not who the scale says I am or the sam total of what My flaws say I am.
I'm going to stop flirting with the unstable things of this world so I can fall completely in love with 
You. I am loved. I am held. I am Yours. I am forever Yours."-Amen 



        That is the prayer from the book "Uninvited" word for word. Now I am going to add some more things to that prayer that personal helps me or that I need help with.


"I'm not who my career says I am. I'm not who my bank account says I am.
I'm not who the children say I am. I'm not who my living situation says I am.
I'm not who my martial status says I am. I'm going to stop thinking of and acting like the things of this world. I'm Loved and Cared for by the Great One, The Almighty God Himself. 
I am Strong.  I am Your Child.  I am Your Princess. Yours til the end of time and on.-Amen

Written and Added on by: Tiffney Wilson
                           
On: January 25th, 2017



          I know this is a short entry but this is all I want it to be about because those two prayers can say a lot for themselves. Just to let people know there might be a lot more quotes and entries from this book because it is a really great one and the prefect one that I need right now in my life.

My Main Verses for 2017

"Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance."- Jude 1:2


"Her ways are pleasant ways,
    and all her paths are peace."-Proverbs 3:17


"Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!"-2 Corinthians 9:15



"A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of."-John 10:10

          I know this entry is a little late to but at least it is being written in the 1st month of the year. I decided that I needed to do some entries with verses in them. It is good for me and for others too or that is what I hope. I kind of had a slide back too after I wrote these verses. It has not be a fully abundant life so far. It has been hard but I still what these verses to be the verses of my life this year. They all have one thing in common. 

           That one thing is: GOD WANTS US TO HAVE A LIFE THAT IS FULFILLED! God has given us promises that we can look to and know that we will get. These 4 verses are only some of the promises that God has given us. The main promise that I get from all of these verses is: Peace because I need that in this moment of my life. Everything is so confusing and messy right now, I don't know what to do with my life but these verses remind me that I can have peace because God has control. 

           The other promises that God has given us through these verses are: an indescribable gift, real and enteral life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of, Mercy, Love, and pleasant ways and paths. These verses kind of makes you look forwards to the life you can have with God. Who wouldn't want a life of all of those? Yet, we don't have to wait for that life in Heaven when we could have it right here on earth. We only need to trust God and follow Him. We need to stop worrying all the time and just step out in faith. 

           While I am writing this, I am carefully thinking about it in my life. There are so many things I want to do but yet I am scared to do them. I think I am not good enough or that I won't have enough money or that it won't fit into the times that I want it to fit into. That is our problems right there. We are so in control or want to be that sometimes it can hold us back and we know that but we still won't let go. Then it gets me thinking: "Is life really something to be wasted by just sitting here and doing nothing or waiting on something or should we go for it when we have the chance to go for it?"

           Right now I am really struggling with wanting to travel on mission trips again and wanting to be a single foster parent. I know I can't do both at the same time but I am trying to see in what order does God want me to do them so I can have a fulfilled and peaceful life for Him, not for me. I would also love to throw marriage and my own family in there too but I honestly think that is becoming more of it will happen if it does, if not then I am fine with it. 

           I know I have big dreams and a great life ahead of me because of how God made me but now it is just about how do I put (tread) it all together so everything will work out. Letting God have complete control over it is something that I am still working on too. 

Learning to Love in the Shelter

         This is another entry that I've had in my draft folder for awhile. Something happened yesterday at work that gave me an idea to write this entry. I do miss the shelter and the type of children that go there. I even miss my children that I had when I was there. I will have a feeling for those type of children everywhere I go now and with every job I work.
           I learned two important things that you need while dealing with all kinds of children. Those two things are: Love and patience. No other place can show you what those two words mean better then a children's shelter. If I was truly honest with myself, before the shelter I was in the field because I felt it was easy for me since I grew up around it. After the shelter
I stayed in the field because I wanted to make a difference in a child's life anywhere I could.
           I've had probably more encounters at my now job then I've had since then. I've had two jobs since then and I have just felt more compassion for the children with disabilities or that have problems in their family more. I almost had to fight for my passion at my last job. Never will forget that moment as long as I live. Now here is the real reason why I decided to write this entry now.
            I have a new nickname that my co-workers gave me and I will explain why because it could be mean. It really is a nice thing towards me or that is how I take it at least. It can only be used at this job though. My new nickname is: "The Korenan Whisper" and here is the reason why.
           We have this little international boy that is 5 years old and he is set in his routine. If his mom is not there by a certain time or his friends leave before him, he starts to cry. Yesterday he cried for the last hour of the day. We all took turns trying to calm him down. I spent a half a hour with him while he was crying. Nothing could get him to stop. When the other teachers would try to get him to stop or get busy and it would work for a few seconds. Then if he saw me, he would stop doing the activity and come my way.
            It is like I have a connection with international children and I am not ashamed of that. I am interested in why though. What do I have that others don't. Could it be that love in all languages, that patience, and that comfort? When people praise me or ask me how I do it, I say, "When you work at a children's shelter, you can pretty much handle anything." I know, though, and through that time that it is all God and I give Him credit for it at the end of the day.

           All this to say that you never know how God will use you in a certain place or with a certain person. Everyone and every situation comes into our lives for a reason. It might just take a few years past the moment to realize how God grew through that time. Because of all this happening to me, I have some fun stories to write about and remember them for life. That is why I also keep a blog because it is moments like these that I want to remember plus I can look back and see the life that I have lived and remember all the blessings God has given me. 

Praying for a Ministry or a Person

        I have had this title in my drafts for almost three months because I wanted to write about it for that long but other things have came up. I finally decided that I was going to right about it now. It make a difference and feels different when you pray just for one or the other. I will admit I have prayed for a certain ministry for about 4 years, not lying, which I felt that has helped some. This past year, though, God has directed me to pray for the leader as a person along with the team when I can.
           Because of that change, it has grown my prayer life and my relationship life in ways I didn't think of. It really showed me that when you pray for a certain person, you see more of who they really are. I really look more into the person that I am praying for to see what they need. I listen closer to what they have to say. I watched to see if they have changed and if prayers have been answered.
           I know that might sound a little creepy but I am the deep kind of person and if I know them personally I usually care enough about them to do that. Usually I ask them first but if I know they won't answer, it is then that I am aware of them and their doings. I like to be intentional about everything especially when it comes to my family and friends. That is what I am doing here. I am being more intentional about the person in charge of the ministry more then the ministry itself and that goes for every ministry or job. That goes for everything in life. We have to be intentional with how we view things all the time, right? I will put what the word "intentional" means on here since I did that for the word "ministry". Intentional means "done with intention or on purpose". 

         Sometimes we have to think to pray for a certain person. We have to make it a commitment to pray for them and only them. Where if you pray for the bigger thing like a ministry it is easy to remember that. Now when you pray for something bigger then them like a ministry, your focus is on the ministry itself or at least it was for me. Ministry is: "the service, functions, or profession of a minister of religion". I was watching the ministry and praying for what it needed as a ministry. 

       Now don't get me wrong, both are good prayers but it needs to be even out at least. That is why I, sometimes, pray for the whole team. If they are having something big like an outing they are doing together or sponsors they are trying to get, it is then I pray for the ministry. You are praying for the service and functions of the activity as a whole, not just the person. 

          I also look at it this way. You are never sure what will happen in the future. That is why I pray more for the people then the ministry. People can learn lessons and live on (use what they learned during that season of life) even after the material things are over. For lack of better words in that sentence. You will also become more intentional with other things in life. I mean praying for a person is small compare to other things in life. If you are intentional with that and can see the changes, then it makes you wonder if you were intentional with other things how would they turn out. 

         I know this might sound somewhat confusing because I am honestly trying to make it a little long but I hope I get the point across clearly. The point is: "It is always better to pray for people, then it is the ministry" if you are only going to pick one or want to pick one. I will say, though, there are times that I start out praying for the person and then I go right into the ministry because sometimes the person, since they are the leader of the ministry, will lead me into praying for everything as a whole. That is funny when it happens too. I just start to think about all that the person is doing and then the team are doing that same thing so I pray for them too. 

         I will also say it works for the ministries like Compassion International and World Vision and your church, friends going in a group on a mission trip and so on too. You can pray for a certain person whether it is your child, your friend or your pastor or someone or some people in the church. You know them personally so you know how to pray for them but at the same time you need to pray for the ministry/group every once in awhile too. 

Who is Jesus?

           Who is Jesus? There is a book that one of my children checked out from her school library called that. It is a series of books titled "Who is........?" I have seen two of them, so far, in that series. One was "Who is Dolly Parton?" and then the other one was "Who is Jesus?" My girl only finished it in three days though which is good for a 4th grader. I don't know how I feel about just having a book in the library about Jesus but then I got to thinking about it deeper. This girl really needs something like that. It might just be a history or bio book to her now but it could grow on her.
          She told me she read it because of the AR reading list they have at there school. There are certain subjects that you have to read about and take a test on and "Who is Jesus?" went under the subject of Biography, which it is but there is more to it too. She summed it up pretty well to me and at a perfect moment. The moment couldn't have been more perfect. It was this past Friday at my job. I was cleaning the children's baskets during movie time and I ask one girl to help me. I asked a certain girl because she was Indian and I wanted to know more about her culture and she if she would talk about it one on one with me.
          Then this other girl came along and asked if she could help clean the baskets and I said "sure". I said that because she was one of the first ones that I made a deep connection with about her mom having cancer and I just wanted to see how she was doing along with her mom. Well, either talk happened because God thought about taking it another way so He did. The girl that volunteered herself started talking about this book that she just got done reading and that was "Who is Jesus?". I forget how we got on the subject of books but before I knew it we were there. So I kind of encouraged that girl to tell me what the book was about and she got every word right down to the death on the cross.
          I mean she started with the 12 disciples and remembered that one of them mocked Jesus while He was getting ready to go to the cross. She told me everything that happened up to the cross with the king and what he said. She told me how many hours Jesus was on the cross and then she told me exactly how Jesus got to be laid in a tomb. The selling the tomb to one of the disciples because he asked and so on. Then she talked about Jesus rising from the dead three days later. It was probably the best way I have heard a "little" one tell the story of Salvation in such a simple way. Just think it was a summary of a book from her school library.
         I asked some questions just to made sure she got it but my words didn't mean much so I forgot what I asked. After we got done for the day and as I was driving home, I was thinking about that moment and how much of a different that girl could have made to that other girl helping with the basket. The other girl was pure Indian. She doesn't celebrate Christmas and she is from India. I know that doesn't mean much but still if you knew her you could tell she is strong in her cultural beliefs which is fine. She did listen really good to what the other girl was saying. There were times where she would try to talk about that didn't stop the other girl from telling me about then book.
         I came home and prayed that night about the girl talking about the book and praying that it would not just be a library book but a real life for her to live if she doesn't already. That somehow she connects that book to another book say like the Bible or something from a church or even church. Now that I am writing this I am also thinking about praying for the little Indian girl that was right there when we were talking about it. That she would get some of it in her head and think about it. I just thought that was a pretty cool moment and I didn't want it to end. I tried to get the girl back onto talking about the book but she went on about another book she read and what the tests are like.
         I just pray that two lives were somehow changed on that day. That a seed started to grow and/or one was in the works of growing. It is all about who is around us and not about us. God's Mission is to bring Glory to Him through His works and not ours. He is sending us the outside world here so we need to keep an eye out and an ear open. I picked both of those girls for a reason and I didn't even know it until the end of the day.

In a Day and the Life of a 29 Year Old

       This is my 600th entry on this blog. I wanted it to be more of a better one but I also thought writing one about this subject was needed. I'm not writing it to get feelings from others or worry others or get talked back to. I'm writing this to show no one is prefect not even me. This will be the most see through one I have probably written on here all these years.
        The first couple of weeks of being 29 has been hard for me. I don't know how people do it by themselves. So far that is how I am feeling. It is probably the most important turn around point in a person's life and no one to guide me or walk with me. The two weeks plus a little more have been very busy and confusing for me. I feel like I'm in the song "Smoke Break" by Carrie Underwood. I've had a lot of thoughts like that song and doubts. As soon as my birthday passed, I started thinking about traveling the world again in the coming year. Then all the more grown up talk started to come out of the blue. I thought I was ready but I am not.
        For example, I really wanted a house of my own. I might get to have one but while talking about paying the mortgage and the loan, it scared me. We even started to talk about repainting that and even though I want to, that scared me too. Then that got me thinking about money and my job again. I hate to think about that. I either have to get two jobs if I want to keep the one I have now or go back to college or take some classes to get a better job. I've thought about both. Right now, just thinking about taking some classes to be in the classroom. I am still wondering if the job being a teacher for upper grades is for me. I don't think I can do preschools anymore. My other job right now is just subbing at other preschools.
        Then there is the always scared that  I'm going to always be alone. I've just talking more to guys then I usually do. I have to hold myself accountable on some accounts with some guy friends. Being 29 has been very lonely for me so far. I need another person to talk to about all of this. My age and the same situation in life. How do I find that in this big city called Bentonville? The city of business and older people. This is not the city for mid-age people unless you are from here are you have a really good hook up with people. 

        I know I feel this way every year when I get older but it is because I am getting older and I need to change and grow up but it is like me thinking how will I do that this year. It is hard sometimes when your birthday and new years are almost at the same time for me. I can only think of what New Year's Eve and Days birthdays feel like. It is like I get new friends or group every year. To me, it is by seasonal right now in this moments of my life for the most part but there are those special people that no matter what I will always be there to support them and encourage them on even if it does take away from my own life. 

        I will admit to that I have stayed up later then I should a lot these past 2 weeks just thinking about things again and playing situations in my head that will never happen. I am at that point again and for some reason I always come back to it. When will that ever stop if it will? It is so much harder when you are on anxiety meds too. I should have never started them because I now feel like I am dependent on those and it is even harder to get back to "normal". That is a goal I have for this year but I don't have anyone to go through it with me or that totally understands that problem. People keep saying that you will find a way to not needs those meds anymore one day and right now I don't feel that way.
        I have been feeling a little depressed too lately. Just with all of these things going on in my life. Just thinking about them have worn my energy down to where all I want to do is sleep and I don't even want to eat a lot, not even the chocolate I brought home from Christmas. It has mainly been supper that I haven't wanted to eat because I have been too sleepy. Then breakfast, I haven't gotten up on time but that isn't on purpose. I just come home and don't feeling like eating at all. I did eat some yogurt last night and that was a first time in a couple of days that I have ate supper. My attention have been to others things that I don't even think about eating. 

        People just think it is so easy to do what you want but it isn't. Some people just think I need to stick it out for one job. That I will get use to it but I won't. I always feel like God is telling me something else but I have no support in what I feel like I really want to do. My dream. It always helps to have a group around you that supports you in the way you want to go but I don't have that yet. I know a lot of my family reads these entries too but I will admit this because it has been a problem for me in the past. I have thought about drinking. I mean I just thought about that last night before bed while I was in bed. That is how hard life is getting for me. Something I thought I would never do or never think about doing I did for a bit. 

         I know people that know me might be reading this might find that surprising as well but there are just some points right now where I just feel like God is repeating Himself so much that messages and verses don't even work anymore. Even talking to some good Christian friends don't help because it feels like they are saying the same thing over and over and over. I don't need words of encouragement. I need action and support right now. I'm crying as I am writing this now too, I will admit. I'm just overwhelmed and need some people to talk to about it right now. Some people that aren't to busy with their own lives. 

          I know I am hard to talk to and hear sometimes because I can be quite but that doesn't mean give up on me. That just means I've been let down a lot and I don't know who I can really trust to side beside me and walk me through things. I push people away I know that but I need people who text things like "we are getting together tomorrow nigh not matter what" or "Are you busy right now because we need to talk?" or things like that. People that are more outgoing and demanding but in a nice and caring way. I ask this and then it might scare me but that is when you pull me closer in so I don't back away. I'll be honest too with this. I can't live like I am now for much longer. My personality has to change somehow, someway but I CANNOT do it alone. 

Jealousy-A Poem

         I wrote this today because I feel so confused and stressed about a lot of things. This is the first poem I have won't in awhile but I got to thinking about something and I just had to write it out for it all to make sense. It is a lot about checking your motives when you about to do something that you can't take back.


Jealousy

I hate to admit I am that kind of girl. 
The girl that holds on so tight. The 
girl that won't let God have the situation 
at certain times. The girl that messes 
everything up, especially those closest
to her. 

Why would anyone who that type of 
girl? A girl that can't trust. A girl that
is always down the person's back. A
girl that you can't get away from, no 
matter how hard you try. 

That girl who sees encouragement 
and uses it in place of jealousy. That 
girl that gets jealous when she knows 
she doesn't need to get in the way. 
That girl who guys look at and says she 
is too clingy. Because of that, they all
back away from her. 

Have you ever really stop to wonder
why? Why she acts the way she does?
Have you honestly stopped and given 
her the chance to talk face to face without
anyone else around? Have you ever stopped
and listened to her side of the story and 
how she really feels and why?

Do you think it could be because of her 
sweet spirit? Do you think it is because
she loves you? She is only jealous because
she cares. She doesn't even know she is 
being jealous times. Just know that if she
is a little jealous that it comes from the 
heart. 

How else is a girl suppose to show her 
love if she can't do it through jealousy? 
It is who a girl is. It is in our make up.
We want that attention and reaction from 
a guy.  We need that reminder of that 
love. We act jealous so the guy knows 
he is lacking just a bit. We act jealous 
hoping to get the guy's attention on us. 

It is something that just comes naturally.
But guys have to understand that sometimes
it comes too naturally so be easy on us. 


Written By: Tiffney Wilson

Jan. 11th, 2016

God Has a Reason for Things to Happen

       "God has a reason for things to happen."

       

         This saying just got to me last night and this morning. I have a friend that says this saying a lot, which is great. It just shows that my friend is trusting God with everything that is happening. It is the most simple and easiest saying to say and remember but to do it and believe it is another whole story. It isn't easy. As I have a new challenge in my life to say and believe that, it has been hard for me.
         For me, a person with high anxiety and stressed, it is good for me to try and remember. It just shows I am giving things to God like I should. We might not see the action right after or we might. That doesn't matter all that matters is that we know God has things in control. Therefore, things happen that we don't even plan for a good reason down the road.
         Something bad might have to us or that is how we think but it might be better for us in the long run. We just don't know it yet. I like this view or picture of mind that I got this morning. Picture a truck breaking down in a middle of a long trip. The part that broke down was a major part of the truck. You might want to get mad because you won't get to your place on time and that messes up your plans.
           It is better if that truck broke down where there was a spot to get off the highway, like a ramp, and a police officer down the road from you so you didn't have to wait for a person and be later to the place you were going. Depending on how bad the break down was, you could have had a crash on down the highway. It just goes to show that God does know what he is doing. We just have to put our trust on Him and then see the blessings He gave us. "Focus more on the blessings that day, then the problems." This lesson could be taught anywhere in our lives. God could teach you through the changing of jobs like He has me or even through the littler things in life. 

           I just used this example because it is one that has happened recently and I like the picture it draws with that lesson. It actually goes down a path (road) but then has a side path where you can pause and spend time with God to figure out what is next and maybe why He let the things happen to you. God does things for a reason. I know for my life every job that I have gotten lead me to the spot I am in now and it is a wonderful spot. It is hard because the pay is different but it is a start in where I really have always wanted to be, a teacher in the public schools. It has got my mind back on track in the strangest but good ways. 

             The example or really situation that happened to my friend is also a story of God looking out for us like He always is. Sometimes we just need that proof because as humans we are so stubborn. I know I am a lot. In the end of that situation, God made everything happen so they could get the truck fixed and back on the path to their goal, which was just another part of making my friend's dream bigger and better. Plus when they got to the house they were staying at for a couple of nights, it was an AMAZING house that they were upgraded too. It wasn't the first house they were rented but a better one for the same cost. 

            We can never guess what God has in store for us at end of each problem. We just have to trust Him and say, "That God does things for a reason" and trust Him with that in mind. I'll be honest on here. I have said that a lot about this friend and his ministry but then again I only see my friend growing closer to Him and that is better in the long run. That is what I really want for my friend if I really dig down deep inside of myself. I want what is best for him. God is doing His Thing for a Reason and I'll just have to wait it out. It will happen if He is willing for it to happen and if not, there is a better reason out there, that I just haven't found yet. 

The Good of Others

 ^"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. ³² Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God— ³³ even as I try to please everyone in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved. 11 ¹ Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ."- 1 Cor. 10:23-11:1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. 24 No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

25 Eat anything sold in the meat market without raising questions of conscience, 26 for, “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it.”-1 Cor. 10:23-26

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Build up someone else-use freedom to do this.

"Love Builds up Others."

-Verses 25-26

"Love Glorifies God."
               
-Verse 10:31-33

"Jesus is always our True North."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


         These verses are going to be part of my favorite verses for this year 2017. It is so strange when you seen a verse everyday but it takes someone like a pastor to explain it along with the other verse around it. The verse I am talking about here is: verse 23. I remember seeing that verse in the lunch room, on the back wall, every day during my college years. I remember thinking to myself too, "what does that really mean?" Here it is 5 years later and I finally understand that verse.
         I have seen 11:1 in my life so much. I have followed some people and those same people have encouraged my life and walk with God without even known it. I hope every day that I am living a Godly life to where people would see God in me and what to follow Him. The other things with all these verses are about doing good for others. Some things may cause other people to stumble or look away. We shouldn't look to our own good but to the good of others. We might want to save these clothes because they are special to us but will you ever wear them again. No, so pass them on to people that will use them and need them more then us. 
           We always have to live with the good intent of others in mind. That is called Love. That is what God is. They won't see God in us if we don't love them. Love points us towards God. That is our true North. When we turn our thoughts and actions towards others then we know what it is like to be like God in a sense of course. Sometimes we see what our actions can do or sometimes we won't see them but just have to believe that they are good. I have been through both of the ways. 
            In my own life, I have seen how other people thinking about others more then theirselves helped me grow in life and just as a person. It is always an "I want to do that too" sort of idea once you see it through other people. Then I have also seen where I won't know how loving them will turn out like at the children's shelter and the children I came in contract with there. I just have to trust and believe our God. It is also like sponsoring a child from overseas with Compassion or someone else. You just have trust what the company is doing and that God will lead the company to do the right thing. 
            This all could go with seeing how different people glorify God in different ways. I know when I see my friends glorifying God for every little thing or what I think is a little thing, it makes me think again, "why can't I do that in my life" and it turns into a challenge for myself. Sometimes we just don't understand what God might be teaching us because we do miss those little things and signs of doing good for others. Loving them when no one else can or will. Even loving our Christian brothers and sisters, when people are calling them names and making fun of their beliefs in certain things. We should be there supporting them every step of the way. 

Books Being Read By Me

     I am going to make a list of books that I want to read this year. I will keep this and see if I can look back on it in December and see if I read them all.


-Uninvited

-Love and Respect

-All the Promises of the Bible

-Heaven

-Without Rival

-One Thousand Gifts

-Radical

-Crazy Love

-What Happens When Women Pray

-Need You Now

-Jesus Always

-God Came Near

-His Needs. Her Needs.

-3:16

-Soul Keeping


Looking at this list, my goal is to read 15 books this year. Can I do it? There are a couple of thick books that might take up most of the year like "Love and Respect" and "Heaven". I could always read the small ones in between those two, though, and that is what I will most likely do.

The Feel of Contentment

        I am in my car during my lunch break from work. I am at a park but not outside because it is too cold. For lunch, I am eating an apple and drinking a pink drink. Enough about what I am doing, I am on here to tell you about my morning this morning. Something came over me when walking into work this morning.
         That something was contentment and peace. If you know me at all, I am the kind of person who likes to plan for the future. I am also the kind who gets stressed easily. After my Christmas break, though, I felt at rest. I am finally at rest and content with my job but it is the things around me that I am not. Things like my apartment, my relationships, and my health.
          I am content at my job for a couple of reasons. I went in this morning and a peace just came over me. I was not of this world when I first walked in. I haven't felt that way with a job after a break for a long time. I remember last year when I came back my job was so stressful and I was worrying about it all during break. I also spent shorter time with my family with that job then I did this time around. There was nothing to worry about because the numbers and ratios where okay. I guess the other reason was I just stepped into a school where I have been all my long and where I belong for now.
         I will also say that during break I got a lot of hugs and talking done with my mom and other people and played a lot with one of my nieces or all of them really a lot this break. That might be strange to some of you. Before break, though, I felt like I was honestly unloved and about ready to give up. I just needed my Love languages filled and living along that is a hard thing to get at times. It felt good spending time with my family. So much that I miss them right now while I am writing this. It was just something about being home for me. A different feeling. I will also say that I got to spend a couple of days seeing a really close friend of mine too, which was special. 

          That content feeling stayed with me for about 5 mins. and then it was back to normal but it was just so good to feel that way after coming back from a break. It was strange too because I had a busy break but yet it didn't seem like it was that busy after looking at the children I know. It just felt like the weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I didn't have to learn anything new, didn't have to stress about anything, or didn't have a new place in the system. It has been 3 and a half years since I have felt this at a job that I like. It went on has normal with no rumor updates either. Honestly, the children were great too! I had no problem with them at all. 

            It was a strange feeling and I wish I could describe it better but it is just a moment you have to have yourself to know what it feels like. Now, my job is where I get away from the other things in my life that a bothering me when it use to be the other way around. It is a place I can go out of my smelly apartment right now. It is a place where I am busy with the children so I don't think about a lot of things. It is a place where I can just be me and no one judges me. It is a place where I know I am appreciated. If I am stressed out about my future, I go to work and just play with the kiddos and forget all about it. I don't even worry about my money situation when I am there. 

           I don't carry those things in with me because I know I'm too busy with the kiddos. I felt like God was saying, "this is the right place for you right now, you don't need to worry about your future. I got that under control." He does and I know that but sometimes it is easy to forget that too. At the same time, though, I sometimes wonder if I have grown so much since last Jan. I have been through some hard things since then but I think they helped me grown up a lot. I might write a entry about this transition when it happens but I wrote a friend telling them that I might change churches because I feel like I don't belong there anymore and that I needed one closer to me. It took me about a half of a year to say it and do it but I did today and now I am okay with that. 

           God is working a lot in my life like He does every Jan. and makes me think about the life changes I need to make and will make. A lot of them now are just for my life right now. I need to be happy and joyful with God in my life so that is what I am aiming for this year or at least at the start of this year. We'll see where it takes me the rest of the year. 

New Year's Day (2017) Sermon

           Three Reasons Jesus Christ Came


-Save the Sinners
         -Main Verse-Luke 19:10
                  - "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.”
         -1 Tim. 1:15
         -Is. 53:6
         -2 Cor. 5:21


-Came to give us a good life
          -Main Verse-John 10:10
                     -"A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real     and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of."-MSG
                     -This verse might be another verse on my year's list of verses to remember and look back on.
          -Matthew 10:35-36
                  -"35 For I have come to turn

“‘a man against his father,
    a daughter against her mother,
a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
36     a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’

          -All about His Presence in Our Lives=Abundant life
       
                -Heb. 13:5
                -"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,

“Never will I leave you;
    never will I forsake you.”

                -Put of greed and put on contentment
                -The promise of His Presence will help you overcome things.


-Fulfillment of God
           -Main Verse: John 17:4
                   - "I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do."
           -Luke 24:27
           -Matthew 5:17
                  -“Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them."             
                  -fulfillment of the Law

           -2 Cor. 1:20
                  -" For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God."
                  -Christ is the fulfillment of the all.



-"INTENTIONALLY CHRIST OBSESSED IN ALL THINGS"-from the book "Exalted"