"In every place of worship, I want men to pray with holy hands lifted up to God, free from anger and controversy. And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes. For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do. Women should learn quietly and submissively. I do not let women teach men or have authority over them. Let them listen quietly. For God made Adam first, and afterward he made Eve. And it was not Adam who was deceived by Satan. The woman was deceived, and sin was the result. But women will be saved through childbearing, assuming they continue to live in faith, love, holiness, and modesty."
These verses tells us, as men and women, what we should be doing and how we should be doing it. First step for man is that they need to pray with hold hands lifted up to God free from anger and controversy. In easier words, they need to be focusing on God and doing what He wants them to do and lead people the way God wants him to lead them. Men should not be mad or in a middle of a fight and if they are, in my situation lately, they should be the one that stands up and say this isn't right. Men are to seek after God and lead the way.
Second step is for the women and that is we need to be modest in our appearance. We should wear decent clothing and not draw attention to ourselves but to God. We should not wear gold or pearls or expensive clothing or fix our hair in some beautiful way and be focused on all of that. It's fun but that is not the main thing we need to do. We need to learn quietly and be submissive. We are not the teacher because God made the men to be the teachers and the leaders. We are just the followers. Yes, we can have say in our relationships but we can't be controlling and that is a big difference. Women need to listen quietly and do. Women need to good things out of their hearts to be noticed like serving God and His people. They need to be focused on doing good for the Lord and not for people. Then when the right man comes along he will love her for her heart the the outward appearance. Women need to have 1 Cor. 13 and the Fruit of the Spirit in their lives. They could be working on those things while waiting towards different people and in different settings because what woman doesn't want to find a Christian man with those same things in his life.
God made Adam first for a reason so he could be the leader of Eve. Then sin came into the world with the snake and the women was deceived thinking she had control and could know everything that God did. She control Adam by letting him have a bite of the apple and Adam was passive and said, "ok". Then that was the first sin or one of the first sins in the world. It was not how God had planned it. Because of that sin, women now has to suffer through childbearing but yet at the same time will be saved through that if they countinue to live in faith, love, holiness, and modesty.
I can't tell you my whole situation because I want to respect my friends but I'll tell you a little what that could look like here on earth. If a controlling woman likes a man and wants to spend time with that man then all she has to do is ask that man when he can spend time with her and if he wants to. As I found out, the man will more then likely say yes or sure and you both will for awhile. That might be because the man is being passive just like Adam was when she offered him the apple. Then there comes a time when the man's eyes are opened and things just doesn't seem right for him so he calls it to stop. I know he didn't do it to hurt me at all but he did it one for himself and two for me because I would never be learning what I am now if it wasn't for the situation. It might be just me but I respect a man that can see when things are getting close but he doesn't want them to so he stands up for himself. He takes the leadership spot that I know in my case that he can take. He is a leader in everything else. Why not this?
I will be completely honest, the man asked me to tell him what I did wrong and I thought that was the dumbest thing ever but looking at it through these lenses I needed that. His response to me after I told him what I did wrong was "that's right, Tiffney". I was Eve trying to control him and he does not deserve that at all and he stepped up. Something else I need to work on is not being so controlling. I knew I was controlling but after this lesson I see I am very controlling and I hate that. Just let God work through all my friendships with guys or girls or both. Just step back and let Him work in my life. I can say that this is the most important and hard way that I have learned a Bible lesson through a guyfriend of mine but it will be in my mind forever because hopefully it has changed me forever so God did use the situation and is still trying to get things back to normal if there is such a thing.
Prayer: "Daddy, please take away my controlling nature/sin. It is not good for myself or anyone around me. Then fill me up with Your Love for people and the Fruits of the Spirit. Please help me work on those instead of trying to control people. Controlling is Your job, not mine. You know what is best for everyone, even me and my friends." - In Jesus' Love, Amen
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