"For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth it shall not return tome empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose,and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it. For you shall go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall make a name for the Lord; an everlasting sign (of His Power and Love) that shall not be cut off.”-Isaiah 55:10-13
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."-Proverbs 3:4-6
"He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’[a]; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”-Luke 10:27-28
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery."-Gal. 5:1
" Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."-Phil. 4:6-8
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."-Phil. 4:13
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."-Proverbs 4:23
"He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”-Mark 4:39-40
Nine verses on Love, Trust, and Freedom (even though they might not say, they show it in your life if you live it out) from a time hanging with friends for about 2 hours. One per night to pray. Doesn't happen a lot to me but it did this time and as I remember these verses then and the day after, I am truly at peace with everything that is going on. I'm not saying it is the easiest then I have been through because it's not but it will be worth it in the end. I'm still struggling and learning a lot and I hope my friends notice that but I'm happy that haven't given up on me just yet. I feel like I'm starting all over with them but maybe that is what I need. Look at these old verses turning into new meanings for me. It has been months since I have seen them or even hung out with them because I was struggling with something by myself and after time with them and putting the Bible study that I'm doing together I know what I need to change about me.
What I need to change is these 3 things. I need to love better, trust better, and have more freedom and let people have more people. Somehow I got so caught up in what I wanted and not want I needed in the past year and that can mess friendships up big time. I'm a worrier and I knew I made so many mistakes but knowing that I did nothing to my friends and they still liked me the same meant the world to me. They still treat me the same too. There were times where I noticed jealously was getting into my mind when hanging with them but then I felt the peace of God come in and say, "Just enjoy this time with them. At least, you are back hanging with them. That is a small step but yet a big step for you and we both know that."
It is s big step for me to go back to a person when they tell me what they think of me. I usually back off and never go back or I push them away on purpose but I'm praying that I don't here. I'm praying that I can see the signs clearer and make the right choices for the both of us. I feel like God is showing me that only to trust and love my friends but also to trust and love Him and give both the freedom to do what they were sent to do in my life.
I will be a little see though here because I know there has to be other girls feeling the same way that I do and did. In a way, I have noticed these past few months I have been emationally and verbaully abused by "friends" espically by guyfriends that wouldn't keep their words. Not as bad as most people and children but I think you could call it that. If not that, I have been bullied by my classmates all through school but mostly high school. I never knew what to expect because when I would trust in the guys in high school but then they would start going out with other girls and stopped talking to me when they did that or they would tease me alone and/or with their guyfriends. I was never bold enough to stand up and have boundaries for myself back then.
As much as I hate to admit it, I think that is what is keeping me from guyfriends now. I'm in a great state and surrounded by great guys but I'm having a hard time with myself. Letting myself in and knowing the time to do that and how. It makes since with the loving and trusting part espically when it comes to trusting a "guy" like God. I say I do but really do I? It's like if a person has problems with their father. Can they have problems with their Heavenly Father? Would I be here if I would just put my trust in Him and see what He could do in my life? No, I would be probably in Guatemala right now with my children. :) I feel like God is using certain people to show me that I can trust humans again but most importantly I need and can trust Him with my life.
It is a process that I'm going to have to get through and set my own boundaries and I can start now because just recently I've seen where I needed to start. It seems and sounds strange right now but I can't wait to see what God has in store for me as I Trust and Love Him more. I just hope my friends, whether girls or guys, will see the process I'm going through and not be scared of it but help me through it in some way whether it is giving me distance for some time or even advice. Prayers for me getting through this life changing process would be great! You could even pray these verses for me. Thanks.
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