Do You Love Me?

         If I would pick one question that breaks my heart and never gets old at my job is the question, "Do you love me?" especially when it is asked by a preschool child I have had before. It was so cute and random. I could just take this little girl and her sister and have them live with me. I've had both on my wing and they are sweet and lovable. I never really thought about it while we were talking about it because it happened so fast but I did think about it on the way home and it broke my heart more.
         I wondered if that was God speaking to me through that little girl because I thought it is the same question He asked Peter before he went on the cross. Is God testing me to see if I'm really okay where I am in life right now? Is He challenging me more? How can you not take a child in after they ask you that question? It was her sister that I gave a Bible to and started reading it to. I can really explain that feeling but if you know me and where I work it just broke my heart to pieces.
          I am writing out those verses in John where Jesus asked Peter three times "do you love me?" and it is hard. I keep thinking what if I see them again or what is God makes another child ask me the same question. I will write out what those verses mean to be later but they talk about go and feed and care for Jesus' lambs and sheep. Isn't that what I'm doing? Does God what me to do more of it like actually be a foster parent?
         It also says that God will lead us where He wants us as we get older. Yes, we chose our way when we are young but as we grow we learn more about who He is and what life is like. I can tell you this job has taught me a lot whether through the children or even the staff at times. We are more willing to let Him lead us (lambs) as we learn to trust Him more every day. God might not take us where we want or expect Him to but He has us there for a reason. He is leading us by His Hands. We could have all our plans planned out at a very young age and then as we get older God might change those plans here and there.
         We also need to be careful that it is God leading us and not other people. We can be another person just to please another person especially us girls to get guys to like us but we don't need to do that. God will bring that right person into our lives and if we are blessed enough we will be asked again, "Do you love me?" and we can have a honest answer. People can take us by the hands without us knowing it and sometimes we might deny it and not see it but if they are we need to let them go because they are not good for us.
           The more I write about these verses in John the more I see that they can go into life in a different ways not just my job or my future but my relationships and friendships too.  This one question can happen in so many stages of life and in so many ways. We need to focus on God and love Him and then everything should come together maybe not easy because we are serving a tough loving God but with Him all things are possible for those who believe.
            I do this and I want to see if you can do it too. When you get ask that question if you ever do, really think about what it could mean to the person that is asking it in relationship with God apart and with that person. For me and where I work since I get ask it probably a lot, it is a good reminder for me to relay that question back to God, "Do I love you like I should?" "Is there more You want me to do?" "Am I just climbing aimlessly over these hills?"