Actions Speak Louder then Words

       You hear the saying, "actions speak louder then words." With some people, that's more true then with others. They can try and cover up their actions with words and vice via but it's hard. With those kinds of people, they are usually the sky type or have no idea what to do in a given situation. They might only do or say something when no one else is around and they might not notice that they are doing it. They just might feel comfortable that way. A way they try to fit in sometimes or hold a conversation is when they are being funny or smartalike.
         The actions I'm talking about is the kind that people do when no one is around or when a person doesn't want to get too close to you. They whether be behind the scenes then in the spotlight. They would whether wave or give high fives then to talk about things. They have more of a quiet spirit within them. That is great because then you can really tell what boundaries are where. Yet there is just something that brings joy to you.
           Sometimes you don't know how much that person means to you until they are out of your life for a while. It's fun to get to know people like that if you are like that but at the same time it can be hard. You want to let them in but your wall is up.
          You know that if a person's actions speaks Louder then Words they have a servant's heart for sure. I've never seen a person's actions speak Louder then Words until I moved to AR and it is a different experience even though that's all I've done in my life too. It is just neat seeing it in other people's lives I guess. Just neat to see I'm not the only one like that because I feel that way a lot.

        Challenge: "Let your actions speak Louder then your words this week and see the difference it makes."

Daughters Coming Back

         This past week (last Friday to be exact) I never saw the story of the lost son from the Bible come more to life than that day. It was all prefect timing on God's part. It was time for one of my little boys to leave that day and I was heartbroken.  I thought it was going to be hard and it was but it would have been worse if 2 of my little girls didn't come back. The girls came in just as the little boy was getting ready to leave.
          It was a God moment when I first saw the 2 girls again. The oldest girl just ran to me while I was on my knees with my arms open wide. I was happy to see them again. It was a good feeling that she ran to me because that meant she remembered me. It gave me a sense of renewed hope again. I was so focused and busy with those two girls that I didn't even get to say good bye to my little boy. Sad but probably for the better.
          I felt like a mother with her daughters coming home again. It started to challenge me and now I want to challenge you all: How many times do you think we run back to God? He stays in that same place but it is us who goes away from Him.  He never leaves us. How do you run back to Him? Do you pray or read your Bible? Do you go back to church or are you a blessing to others or all of the above just depending on your mood?
          I will tell you one thing.  I couldn't stop smiling that night at all. It was a perfect way to end my long week. :) Again, sorry this is a short entry but it is one that should make you think. The shorter, the better sometimes.

Can't Take the Country Out

        "You can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl."
          That's my saying too. I never thought it was until this week when I noticed how much the farm meant to me. I'm pure country. There is a country song that says, " From LA to New York City, she goes around the world." That is so true for me. In the states, I've been from Montana to Washington DC. The outside of the state I've been from Mexico to London, England. It's neat to go to those places and get the experiences but never in my life would I love in those cities. Now Montana out. In the country is another story but still not in a big city like Bozeman,  MT. There is no place I would rather be then in the country. I always will come back to the country. Cities drive me nuts.
           I like the quietness and beauty of the country. I like the slow pace of things.  I like the hard work you do on the farm. I also like the times spent on gravel roads whether by self or with friends. I also like the simple way of life that country life brings. You don't need a big house or lots of things. Just a small cabin and family and of course some land to live on.
          There is no better way to learn about life then in the country. All the life that goes on on a farm.  The work you have to do on it. The exploring and all the thinking you can do if you have a lot of land. I mean I could go into details but I won't because those of you who live on a farm will get it.
          I grew up my first four years on a farm so it is stuck in me. It is really how I was raised plus a small town girl. They do say you learn the most important things in your life in the first 5 years of life.
           I do not like the busyness and loudness of the city. You can't see any nature or be outdoors very often. Cities just overwhelms me a lot with all those people and places. It just seems so small when the country just seems so big.
          I also like how the country women seem to be more laid back and creative or at least all the ones I know are. It could be that they are crafty, cooks, likes to sew, scrapbook, like to take pictures,  and other things.
         Some family call me "their little girl" still at the age of 26. For the older ones, that is how they remember me. I like to think of myself as the little, country girl.               My heart is country and it will stay that way forever!

Mom at the Age of 23

          I'm outside on this windy day on my phone because I still have no computer. If it doesn't make sense I'm sorry but I had to get some of it out. In honor of Mother's day, I'm going to write an entry about moms.  Now most of you might be thinking what do you know about being a mom. I don't know everything but I know some especially when they aren't your own children.
            I have some verses that you can look up.  Sorry I can't write them out for you all. They are: biologically-Gen. 9:7, adoptively psalm 82:3, and spiritually Matthew 28:19. I feel like I have been a mom since the age of 23. How? you might ask. I started my journey as a spiritual mom for children in TX over a spring break in college to last summer in Guatemala. Now I'm doing it adoptively through my job.
           Some might say "still you have no idea". I don't want to start anything this is just another point of view.  A point of view that gets me through my day.  At my job,  I do clean after them, put them to bed, give them their baths, and most importantly I'm there for them when no one else will be everyday.  That's why I hate missing work a lot. I'm there to play and love on them and keep them safe. I remind them of that often.
         Now, don't get me wrong. I would love to have a family of my own to take care of but for now I am content and happy with this. Of  course,  that is the next step in my life.  The next desire of new my heart. I'm blessed where I am and I need to see and spend time in it before I move on. In a way,  God is really preparing me to be not a great mom, but a good mom. God is showing me my mistakes and telling me those are ok and you have to put a lot of trust in Him to with children. I could have children all their lives for 18 years and honestly I would whether have that then only 3 months. Trust is the big thing God is teaching me now as I am letting go of my group of 4 children that I had mainly by myself.
           I can be a single foster parent if that is another thing God is calling me to do because children are my passion. I would whether help children then worrying about marriage. It's a hard call but God will lead me when and where He wants me to be in His Time.

                        Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there whether you have your own  children or not. :)

Living for God

       This will be the last long one that I will write in awhile because my computer crashed. I can write on my phone but those enteries will be short. In Sunday school, we talked about running to God and during church we talked about what contentment really means and what we, as God's people, should do. We read 1 Timothy chapter 6 verses 1-21.
       Contentment could also mean "warning off" looking/pushing away things because we are fine where we are. Contentment does not mean "happiness". We might not like where we are but we can live with it by God helping us through it. He has a plan for everything that we go through. We should go for godliness, faith, love, patience, righteousness, and gentleness. Usually, that is what God is trying to grow and teach us when we are going through something hard or even something easy. We would push away things because it is not love or we can't have patience with it. It could not be gentle or godliness.
         Verse 13 says, "God who gives life to all things". Just think about that for a second. God gives life to all things whether alive or not. He is the One that created everything so He gives life to everything. Humans are His speical work and He loves us no matter what. He won't push us to love Him but yet He gives us the freedom to make the choice because what is true love if we are made to love a person. We have a choice through our actions and words. It is not a feeling.
          Verse 17 reminds people to trust God and that He is good.
          As I was sitting there listening to the sermon and reading the chapter, I was thinking about 3 different people that I am or was helping by showing them or reminding them of God. The peacher also gave us: Matthew 27:11-13 to look at too. I have one person in my life that I can help money wise. I can give more money too and also pray for. I have two people that I can help emotionally. Help them get back on track with God and happy again. Have them look on the positive side of life. Then I have one friend that I hope to help spiritually and lead them to God.
         God is working in my life. I see how He is using me in other people's life at honestly the weakness part of my life yet at the same time it is the strongest part of my life. I don't understand what I should tell them but at the same time I see how blessed I am to have what I do in my life. I wouldn't trade what I have for anything else even if we don't talk much or get along all the time. Every person have their moments.

Children Run to Me

     The children will run to me when they don't know the person very well. That feeling is a good feeling. I know that I got their trust yet they will listen to be at the same time. It has been fun having a group of 4 by myself at work. It was hard work but know I can see that hard work,  warning their trust,  is paying off in some ways.
       They know I love them and want the best for them. I've seen that with this group of children during these past few weeks. I am their comfort. What I say goes most of the time. I'm going to miss that but it's neat to see that I can only build that trust in 3 months or less with all the hard things. It sure wasn't easy at all! :) It is the constant being there for them. Someone they know that won't go away.
          They might not remember what was said but at least I was there for them and it showed through my actions. Maybe the mom thing isn't has scary as it seems might be hard for sure but not scary. I can't think of how much a mom worries too.  I worry a lot about the children and they are not even more. I know that's Love but if I have that much love for other children how much would I have for my own. How much does God have for us, especially in our sinful state. I could and do stay up late going over the day and what I could do differently the next day. Thank God though we have another chance or should. 

          Not only do the children run to me but I run to a lot of other people even them for different things like fun times when I need to get my mind off of things. I noticed and was thinking about how I have 3 brothers in Christ that I could point out and a lot more sisters in Christ that I can run to for help when I need the encouragement or help. It is like a big cycle and that is what I believed God meant it to be. To see Him through other people. To share His Grace and Love with other people. To share His Message with the world. The children see Him through me but I see Him through my friends and family.
          The children run to me like we should run to God in our time of needs or really anytime. We should take our dreams and problems to God and let go of them so He can work on them.

Heart Over Mind

     "I've let my brain run my life when really it should have been my heart running it because I always come back to the heart felt feelings for people and things. God lives in our hearts not our mind."-Saying By Me
     This is something that I have been thinking about but it is not a every time thing because, as humans, we are all broken no matter what we follow or how we follow it. We can only look to and follow God and He can use either one, the heart or the mind. 
     We should be still and take the time to get to know God and trust Him on the path He is taking us on. At the same time, we should be keeping busy for Him so the devil does not get us. Even though, our good deeds might not be know until later in life or after this life, it is good to follow what God wants us to do for Him even if it seems like the little things. Heart over Mind seems like a hard balance and that is where boundaries are good for us as humans. We should ask the questions: Where are you leading me,m Lord?, What do I really need to do?, Who am I really in You?, and other questions like those.
     It is true when we are not keeping our minds busy focusing on God that is when the devil can get the best of us. Our mind really is a battlefield for thoughts and other things. Crazy, how I am learning all of this at the age of 26 because if I look back I have lived me life with my mind instead of my heart. I have been making expectations and assumptions all of my life it seems like of people and the future. That might be why my life is so hard but yet we are sinful humans made out of dust and we aren't perfect. No one is but God and His Love is the only thing prefect in life. It is hard to wrap our minds around but that is what makes it so great. We need to be busy for the Lord so the devil can't get it yet have the time for the Lord. Am what I'm doing now serving the Lord or is it just something to keep me busy? 
     Our brain is such a complex part of our body probably the most complex thing that God made in us. It can do and think so much and do a lot of things at one time. It has so many little pieces and areas that information goes to depending on what kind it is. Maybe that's why God keeps telling us to listen to our heart because that is where He lives and where the Holy Spirit leads us. He gives us our heart's desires. not our brain's desires. It just amazes me how our brain can do all these things without even us knowing it. I've let my brain run my life, when really it should have been my heart running it because it seems like I always come back to the heart of the problem or the heart's true feelings for people and things. When I come back to what my heart is feeling, I'm at peace instead of confusion and trying to make things right with people. 

Something to think about: God made our brains to be complex battlefield but yet our heart is simple. Is it because He tells us to trust Him with all of our heart and soul? Is it because we are not able or suppose to figure out His Love for us but yet we are suppose to do it anyways? Think about it. :)