Pray the Hardest, when it is the hardest to pray

          My name means.........."Appearance of God". I started thinking about my name on Thursday while I was at an "Anxiety" conference. It has been awhile since I thought about it.           I saw a verse on a friend's Facebook page on Aug 28th, 2015. It was: 1 John 3:24. My friend put it in their own words, "My life is not my own, it's intertwined with Christ." I looked up the verse and verses before it today and it was about loving people like Christ has loved them. It was also about being one with Christ. I was also telling myself while I was falling asleep and just saying "I'm intertwined with Christ" and it helped me relax and fall asleep.          Then, tonight at church, the sermon was about "Living as One" with Christ and the church. The verses that the pastor used was from John 17. They talked about how we are to live as One in His Name, By His Word, To this World, and to give God the glory. ...

"18-20  My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love. This is the only way we’ll know we’re living truly, living in God’s reality. It’s also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves. 21-24  And friends, once that’s taken care of and we’re no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we’re bold and free before God! We’re able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we’re doing what he said, doing what pleases him. Again, this is God’s command: to believe in his personally named Son, Jesus Christ. He told us to love each other, in line with the original command. As we keep his commands, we live deeply and surely in him, and he lives in us. And this is how we experience his deep and abiding presence in us: by the Spirit he gave us." -1 John 3:18-24 (MSG)  "My life is not my own, i...

        I went to a conference last night, at a church in Bentonville, called "Addicted to Anxiety". The conference was put on by "Tangible Truth Ministries" at the First Baptist Church in Bentonville. It was just full of information for me and every other women there. I probably had 6 pages of things that I wrote down from that 2 hour conference. There were 5 different speakers. Two of them were live and then the other 3 were live from videos but it was still great. I will write about some of the things that I wrote down and thought was important but that still won't be enough to explain how it touched my life. I might have to do some Bible verses entries from the verses I got during the conference.         The first speaker that talked was Angie Cross and she was live from a video but she still had an important message and I got a lot from her. To her, anxiety is those nagging thoughts that you can't get rid of and fear is those thoughts you th...

        Today was the most mind relaxing day I have had in, probably, over 2 years, which is strange because I probably had the hardest thing happen to me today as well. I won't go into the details about the hardest thing because I don't want people to know about it. Let's just say I had to find something out the hard way and I don't appreciate that at all. That is only one thing, even though, I have to deal with and think about it for the next few days. I was trying to forget about it and move on but I can't let it go.        It was a strange relaxing day and I call it mind relaxing because I did two things on that same day that I haven't done in awhile. Those two things were that I started counseling again and I am not scared to admit that. I also had yoga again tonight and this is my first week where I went to yoga 2 times a week and that is how many times that have it during the week. I had one in the morning and the other in the evening so b...

Luke 4:31-37 The Message (MSG) 31-32  He went down to Capernaum, a village in Galilee. He was teaching the people on the Sabbath. They were surprised and impressed—his teaching was so forthright, so confident, so authoritative, not the quibbling and quoting they were used to. 33-34  In the meeting place that day there was a man demonically disturbed. He screamed, “Ho! What business do you have here with us, Jesus? Nazarene! I know what you’re up to. You’re the Holy One of God and you’ve come to destroy us!” 35  Jesus shut him up: “Quiet! Get out of him!” The demonic spirit threw the man down in front of them all and left. The demon didn’t hurt him. 36-37  That set everyone back on their heels, whispering and wondering, “What’s going on here? Someone whose words make things happen? Someone who orders demonic spirits to get out and they go?” Jesus was the talk of the town.         I love what verse 32 says about Jesus' teac...

       I am going to be more real then I have ever been on my blog so please be careful what you think and what you say. I'm doing this because I know I'm not the only person out there who feels this way. We all do once in awhile. Some of us just more often then others so please be considerate of what I'm saying. I just feel like it is time for me to be somewhat real since I have the time and maybe it will help some others to see that being real is okay. We don't all need to be fake all the time even over the computer. We just have to be careful not to write about anyone else's life or start rumors about anyone else.         I have a disorder or sickness or whatever you want to call it. Not sure quite what to call it but I have it and there is no doubt in my mind like there use to be. I was thinking about this last night while going to be and I'm finally came to the real thought that I do have anxiety whether I like it or not.  This could be...

         Putting a disclaimer on this poem. I did write it but I wrote it during college for a class assignment after I read a certain book for the class. The book was called "Ordinary People". I am putting it on here because it is just another poem that I wrote and I'm trying to put all of them on my blog.  No matter why I wrote the poem or what for. I have the papers that I had to turn in for college with the poem and the explanation of the poem. Where Am I in Life? Written By: Tiffney Wilson  In life, where am I? I have no idea. I am  lost and so confused.  I am discovering new  feelings that I have never felt before. I'm really scared. Please help me, if you can. I need all the help I can get.  In life, where am I? I just got used to everything new and then something  happens again and I get lost all over. Why does it seem like everything bad is  happening to me? In life, where am I? I feel li...

       " A good woman is hard to find,      and worth far more than diamonds."                  -Proverbs 31:10          This verse was the verse that was going through my mind right before I went to sleep last night. I probably laid in bed for about 15 mins. just thinking about this verse and what it means in my life right now. I will tell you in this entry that I am also reading and trying to live this chapter out because these verses really reminds me of my grandmas. I could see every one of these verses in their lives. It might been in different ways but I saw them and I want to be like them in every way that I can.          Right now, I have nothing to work towards or care for accept for myself and my future. That might sound a little selfish but really if I want to live out these verses, it really isn't that sel...

    " She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,  and keeps them all busy and productive."-Proverbs 31 "Many pray, Lord, send me a husband or wife. But few pray, Lord, prepare me to be the husband or wife I need to be."-Adam Cappa            Wow! I come back to AR from my parents' house after a few days and it feels like God is just throwing ideas at me to write more. I came home and saw this saying on a friend's Facebook and while thinking about it for a bit, Proverbs 31 came to my mind. I read that Proverbs before I went to bed and woke up this morning deciding I am going to be that kind of wife or at least work on it since I have the time right now.            I want to say some things about the saying from Adam Cappa. I don't know Adam Cappa that well but I do know he is a famous Christian singer and songwriter. Just some back history if you didn't know him either. The saying is so tru...

"I've put so much on hold in my life because I know this is what God wants me to do and how I can spread His Word, but that doesn't mean it's easy or that I never think about doing something different. When you are walking the path God has you on, that's when things are really going to come at you and try to knock you off but with each battle you get through, it's just that much more rewarding for sticking to your path."-Saying by a friend in 2015           I couldn't help by relate to these words that a friend of mine said. Those words are so encouraging and what I need right now at this moment in my life. A lot has been going on and it is just neat how God works through people because my friend has no idea of everything that is going on but that is how I feel too. The 2nd sentence is how I feel now but the first sentence is something I have thought before especially before "life" happened to me.          Right now, in a wa...

         Yesterday was the get together for my grandma's passing. It was a family reunion like she would have liked. Almost everyone was there and we had a fun time talking and laughing together. I even saw some people that I never saw before or at least don't remember seeing. It was around lunchtime so we had BBQ for lunch that was brought in by "RibCrib". I lasted all but an hour and a half of the together. We sang songs and told memories of my grandma. My 3 older nieces started us off but singing a song and then one of my cousins played his gatuiar and lead us in 3 songs. They were: Tis So Sweet to trust in Jesus, Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus, and Amazing Grace. Then my aunt played a song called "Pray for the Small Days".          It was all very sweet and grandma would have loved being there, physically with us, but we all knew that she was there, spiritually. I did have to take some time, though, and just be myself because it was gett...

The Two Roads to Love By: Tiffney Wilson  Written On: August 9th, 2015 Have you ever thought about love  as a road? A Road that every couple take even before they meet. Their  end, though, is each other. They might not see it at 1st or will put it on hold for a little awhile. The  map might not make sense. They could  be totally doing the opposite of the other person. Yet, God can open their heart  at the right time.  One person could be, doing something big. The other person could be doing  something small. Then their purpose  in life flips on them. It flips on them to  get a better understanding of the other person.  They can see the road coming together. They can see how it can work. Yes, there  are some things that they both have to  work on. They have to pick up things on the way.  Things that will make a marr...

            15  “If you love me, keep my commands.   16  And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate  to help you and be with you forever—   17  the Spirit of truth.  The world cannot accept him,  because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be [ a ]  in you.   18  I will not leave you as orphans;  I will come to you.   19  Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me.  Because I live, you also will live.   20  On that day  you will realize that I am in my Father,  and you are in me, and I am in you. 21  Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me.  The one who loves me will be loved by my Father,  and I too will love them and show myself to them.”  22  Then Judas  (not Judas Iscariot) said, “But, Lord, why do you intend to ...

    "  12  My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.   13  Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.   14  You are my friends  if you do what I command.   15  I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.   16  You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you  so that you might go and bear fruit —fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.   17  This is my command: Love each other."- John 15:12-17 (NIV)          As I read these verses, I see a pattern in them. God wants us to love others. There is no greater love then laying down your life for a friend. That is where Christians usually stop but if you keep going there is a stronger messa...

         I can't believe that I am going on my 4th year in Arkansas. Not only am I going on that year, it might be my last year. I don't know what to expect in this coming year. I am going into it without a job and without a plan. This past year, through, as been a big blessing in so many ways. Probably one of the best years that I've had in Arkansas. I've seen dreams come true and have learned a lot and grew a lot in Christ. Here is a summery of what my past year was like in Arkansas.          I've been through three big Bible studies that have changed my life and my way of thinking. One by Beth Moore called "Breaking Free" and another one called "Breathe". The most important things that those two studies have taught me is that I'm beautiful to God when I let go of things and that I need to rest more then I do. I need a Sabbath and that can be any day, not just a Sunday. It could even be a hour or minutes. I just got done with another ...

         I know I need a better name for this entry but that is the way I can remember what this entry is about since I cannot type the toddler's name in it at all. This little boy was a miracle to watch while I was working at my job. He brought laughter and joy into my life and each and every day that I was there. He started out not being able to do anything but with a lot of OT, he was a normal toddler by the time that I left. Not a baby anymore.          Now to tell you how he was when he came to the my job. He would not stop crying at all, he would not sleep, he would choke almost every time that he ate anything, whole food or baby food, and he couldn't move around. He also had some problems with his middle area and he would look one way while using the other hand to do something else. Those two things weren't lined up like they should have been for his age. He also had his 1st birthday there and that was only a day or 2 after he ca...