Pray the Hardest, when it is the hardest to pray

 Dear Daddy,           I know every couple has their own situations. I know I might be an expectation because I blame myself but why is it the guys in certain relationships. Really, I am not blaming a certain side because anyone can mess up. That is our human nature. Why is it up to the other side to be the strong ones? Why do I notice more things like these things? Why do I care more about these kinds of relationships? Why is it hard for guys to care and stand up for the ones they say they love? What about the children if they have some? I am here for a purpose for women if I can see these many in my life right now. I can see more of them because I have had my heart broken. Might not be in the same way or with the same situations but it is still hard just in a different way. Are You (God) trying to tell me something before I make a mistake with my future husband right now in my life? In Jesus' Name, Amen

           This is the sermon that was during church this morning. It made a lot of sense when it was put in a simple way. John 6:22-55    -Believes=trust, lean on, cling, rely on ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  "Bread of Life is a person (aka Jesus)." "God is there when you NEED him." "Receive the Word of God, eat it like bread." "Ingest Christ." "Eat God spiritually." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ John 1:14   New International Version (NIV) 14  The Word became flesh  and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory,  the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace  and truth. John 6:31-33   New International Version (NIV) 31  Our ancestors ate the manna  in the wilderness; as it is written: ‘He gave them bread from heaven to eat.’ [ a ] ” 32  Jesus said to them,  “V...

           It has been forever since I have actually wrote an entry about my life. I have been so busy with family and work that I just haven't found the time to write anything but now this Friday night I have found time. I have time to relax and write, which I need a lot of because things have just been stressful for me lately and I am talking about my whole life, not just certain parts of it. I know this entry is a little late because I should have wrote it at the start of this month, when I actually started this blog but instead I am writing it at the end.            This entry won't be one of my touchy ones because it is just about how I have been writing in this blog for 5 years now, counting this year. It is funny because a lot has changed in those 5 years and they just keep changing. My life is still going and I have no idea where it is going to end up at. It is not going to end up like I planned it though in college, I...

Isaiah 55:6   New International Version (NIV) 6  Seek  the  Lord  while he may be found;      call  on him while he is near. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Isaiah 55:8-13 “For my thoughts  are not your thoughts,      neither are your ways my ways,” declares the  Lord . 9  “As the heavens are higher than the earth,      so are my ways higher than your ways      and my thoughts than your thoughts. 10  As the rain  and the snow      come down from heaven, and do not return to it      without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish,       so that it yields seed  for the sower and bread for the eater, 11  so is my word  that goes out from my mouth:      It will not return to me empty, but will accomp...

"Sin is always turning relationship into performance."-David English ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "God gives a beautiful space to cultivate relationship."-Justin R.            I was just going to do a positive poem about a beautiful place but now that I think about it and what I have been through lately, I am going to write a bad to good poem. It will kind of be a romantic one or at least it will be to me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Beautiful Place-A Poem  What is a Beautiful Place? To a lot of people, it has flowers, sunshine, warm temperatures, and really bright day with a lot of happy and welcoming people. I am going to talk about a different beautiful place. A place where nothing is perfect and right. A beautiful place doesn't have to be all those pretty things. It can be a place of hardships and confusion and just not knowing anything. It can al...

Dear Daddy,          I am having a hard time I will admit. With all my heart, I want to do what is right and not be selfish towards other people. I want my friends to be happy in life too. Their own life and if that doesn't involve me then I should be fine with it. It has been more then a month and I just realized it this week. I still wanna be but is it really worth my time? I know I prayed earlier for a clean heart this month and I want that to continue that prayer. Not sure what that looks like for me or other people yet and if they even be in my life once all clean. Even to move on, everyone needs to be cleaned of the past. Daddy, You know how hard that is for me to say and You are the Only one that knows it hurts me. Right now, though, I am looking every way and to every path because I don't know what to do. On the outside, I am always the strong girl even though this whole thing. I've just been so busy that I hide them lately. When I calm down enough, wi...

         When did life get so hard? Where did the simplicity go? Simplicity like cotton balls (aka pom pom balls) and dishes. Trying to figure out how and what colors go where and together is the game. I asked the teacher that was working with me those two questions at the top. She responded with "when iPads entered the world." Sadly, that's true.            They might not be able to match the colors like they are suppose to. That's okay though. Some children just have fun putting them in and getting them out. The simple and easiest way. It was so neat to see that. It calmed 3 of the wildest children down. Amazing how that happens! To make a point between USA children and international children, these two children I am talking about were international children.              The children were running around until I got them out. Then, they sat down at t...

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Psalm 51:10 "You can't change what's going on around you until you change what's going on within you."-Brothers in Christ Outdoors ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~          I love that verse and the saying. I think they go together perfectly. I saw the verse on a friend's email and thought about praying it. I prayed that verse over my friend and me. I can't say much about my friend because I don't know much but I know for me it is what I need.           I need to get rid of the old and start clean again. I need God to give me a steadfast spirit of Him in me. I need to be happy where He is leading me and focusing on that. If I want to change anything around me, I need to have a renewed spirit in me. I can't take care of things if I don't take care of myself. That is a lesson I have to learn everyday.     ...