Pray the Hardest, when it is the hardest to pray

As I was looking in this little girl's eyes today I couldn't help but notice something about her. She is so sweet and smart but yet has so many problems and it isn't her fault. I want to help her and I would if I could but I can't. All she needs is that one on one and to let someone know she cares about her so much that they would cry in front of her. I started to because I knew how she could be and she really disappointed me. I had a good day with her one on one. She painted my toenails and she painted her own fingernails. It is strange because moments I see why a person would give up a child like her but then again if you just know what you are doing I see nothing wrong. It was strange and funny because I had to almost cry in front of her to make her see I really did care for her. I really did enjoy spending time with her. I had to keep repeating I cared for her, ask her what's wrong, tell her to talk to me, that I wasn't mad at her I just wanted to know what ...

This past Sunday we talked about Nehemiah and how God has been leading him through His Plan for him. The lesson really got me Sunday because it gave me the steps to work towards God's Plan and Dream for me and it showed me where I was in it and how far I need to go. In chapter one of Nehemiah, Nehemiah had a concern for his country, Jerusalem, because their wall burnt down. When he heard about this he sat down and cried and fasted and waited for days. He prayed to the Lord and asked for success when he was ready to go ask the king for help. Finding out what needs to be done, having a concern for it, and praying about it is the first step that needs to be done. He told the king what happened and the king wanted to help him out. The king asked him questions and Nehemiah was able to answer them. He also had a plan of what people to bring and what he needed to rebuild the wall. When he got to Jerusalem, he waited 3 more days. Then he went out into the night by himself to see what the p...

God is working in me a lot espically since I finished a Bible Study yesterday called "When God Speaks" through my church. God will use every way He can to get across to us whether through His Word, His people, His church, or everyday life. It is sad when 19 children has to sleep in the DHS office over one weekend because there isn't enough foster homes or people to take them in. I've been going through somethings with friends and work that made me realize that I could be better at being more and ways I could grow more as a leader and as a person. I need to have more confidence and trust in myself more and what I'm doing and want to do and then use my words to share that with people outside of work. I need to and want to have more intentional talks with people and see where they are at in their lives. I'm excited because the thought of becoming a foster home might come true as God leads the way. I talked to a foster group at my church and they are going to get ...

God has His Way of getting things through to people there is no doubt about that and He got me to where I just surrendered right then and there to His Will. I work with abused and abandoned children and it is sad when they tell you their story like it is no big deal but they have to get it out somehow. I was rocking a little boy to sleep this past week and he went on and on about his life to where it made me cry in the dark room and surrender to God. This past week I have felt like I have been fighting God about what He wants me to do and why I am where I'm at even though I love it. I've been fighting Him about, for now, my future foster home. Can I do that or do I want to do something else? Do I want to stay here in AR or do I want to go somewhere else for good? Questions like those were asked this week. The little boy was talking about good and bad people, how he was scared of the dark and didn't want me to leave him, how his house was dirty and he had very little food. H...