Lake Girl-A Poem

I'm such a lake girl. That explains
a lot about me. I love spending
time by the lakes even if they are
small ones. Growing up by one might
have something to do with that.

Maybe it is the look of the sun on
the water. The shiney dots on and
on in the water. Maybe it is the
people around it fishing. Bringing
back good old memories for me.

I know it is the peaceful feeling
when nothing around you seems
right or hard. The wind blowing
in your hair making you think
you are care free. It is the small
waves getting bigger and bigger
with the wind.

Showing you that life can be
rough sometime. Yet at the
same time there can be smooth
moments too. It is a lot prettier
with the bring blue sky out.
Seeing God's creation all around
you.

Making you want more of it. You
can never get enough. Swimming
in that brown water time and time
again. Now that I think about it
big or small I do love the lake.
From pond size to two states wide.
I've been around lakes all my life.



Written By: Tiffney Wilson
Written On: Feb. 11th, 2017

God Uses People to Teach Others

        God's Love is Amazing! God's Love is Great! God's Love is Unconditional! This is what I'm learning at my Bible study especially this week. I don't know if I can recall how many times God showed me His Love this week in the strangest ways. I'm going to try though.
        It has been a hard week for me. I have worked extra hours and would get upset over the little things. Things like payments due, worrying about the cost of meds, and getting help. I also worked to extra mornings, which made me really sleepy. God showed me in those little ways that He will and can provide. A payment got paid off because I finally humbled myself to let it get paid off.
       The meds. were less then I thought they would be once I got my insurance to work. I could afford them after that. I also got a 2 and a half hour nap yesterday. Those were the small things but it was at Bible study last night that changed my outlook on a lot of things. It was about having a "Real" Love relationship with God. I took a lot of notes in the margins of my book last night of what was said.

            One thing that I noticed about me: "I am a person who likes to keep really busy during the day like working a full day but yet I can't at this job. If I do work a full day it is because I am subbing at a preschool and then going to my main job. God tells us to take the time. through, and spend it with Him. That is another thing I got from last night. You don't need to be busy for God but you do need to take the time for Him. It made me think about my time I have between my shifts. I know I have barely enough money to live on right now with my job but did God give me this job so I can spend more time with Him. I actually have time now to read the Bible and pray more then I ever had before because I worked a full time job. Is God wanting me to get closer and Love on Him more during this season of my life?
         I've also been doing this Love thing all wrong all of my life. Towards God and towards people. If I got one thing from last night, it was "God can put people in your life to show you what you need to work on in your life." I can say God has done that for me all my life when I look at my life and I have been responding the wrong way all that time too. He puts people in my life that I try to encourage and talk to them but that talking turns out to something that I needed for myself. It is something that I write down so I can understand because overtime I'm thinking that could be me. I think, "Hey, I needed that too" but it doesn't hit me until I write it out as encouragement to someone else. 

          As I think about it and my past, I noticed I have been doing it since high school and so has God. God has been putting people in my life to teach me things about myself but I turn it back on them. I noticed I was bad at it when I went to my friends for every little question I had and I got better at that part but not the big emotions part. I need to work on that part now. I need to try and understand God and what He is doing in my life. I need to turn to His Love for me because He cares that way for me. He will use people but I don't need to say anything to those people unless they ask. The strange thing in my situations is that the people have the same or almost same personalities and they have a dream that they are going towards. 

        I need to stop looking at the person like they need help or encouragement from me and look at them as a gift from God that He gave me to help me through some of my hardest times and growth. That is why I write those random emails sometimes to my friends because I just need it down on "paper". It also helps seeing how they live their lives for God and how I should live my life for him too. God works through them to me. There was also something else that caught my attention last night and that I couldn't agree with more. One of the lady leaders told me something that confirmed something I already felt. She told me, "That there is something big that God has planned for you and it will happen soon." 

           For me, that could be so many things because I want to do so many things but now that I know something big is going to happen, I can start asking God, "What is it?" Is it this or that? Does it have to do with them or just a person? I can start down the path God wants me down, now that I know something is going to happen. I see it too because I feel like I have reach the very rock bottom as it can get. I have experienced it now it is time to bring me out of it. I think with starting this new and understanding of a Love Relationship with Christ that "thing" will happen because my outlook is being changed. I am focusing more on God and who He wants me to be then anything else.

           "Loving God is the most important thing we have to do in life. When we do that, everything else falls into place." "God should be our 1st and foremost thing in this life."

Worthless-A Poem

    Worthless is not a
Feeling you want to feel.
It feels tiring. It feels like
You have no energy left.
It feels like you can't do
Anything right. It also
Feels like no one understands
You.

It is where you have reached
The bottom of the pit. There
Is no way out. You are left there
Fighting for yourself. You
Might have little holes here
And there that you try to go
Through but can't. It seems
Like it will never end.

It is either one thing or the
Other thing. You are happy
With one part of your life
But the other part not so
Much. It is also a lie from
Satan himself.

It is one way that Satan
Loves to get people. It
Is the most painful too.
If Satan gets you to feel
Worthless, then he can
Make everything else fall
Down around you.

There is someone who
Loves you unconditionally.
That Someone is God. He
Will give you whatever you
Need to get through it. He
Will give courage,
Preservation, and make you
Determined.

God loves you
For who you are in Him. He
Made you in His image. You
Are Love by Him and that is
All that should matter. When
Your focus is on God loving
You, you can do anything
For Him.

Written By: Tiffney Wilson

Written On: Feb. 9th, 2017

How Are People Liking My Blog?

           I'm glad I am getting more then 300 views. Am I really getting that much or is something going on with this website? I have been getting more then 300 views in the past three days and 700 of them are coming from the USA. Can anyone tell me what might be going on? How would I know if I am getting hacked or have been hacked? Is that a possibility when I'm getting more then 300 views. It is funny because like I said I have been getting this for the past two days. I have been on this blog website for about 3 years or 3 and a half years now. I'm just worried that it is getting hacked and that I need to move my blog to somewhere else.
           Am I the only one with these "problem" going on or are other people on here having that happening to them? Please leave comments on here. I really want to know what is going on so it can help me write safely. Thanks.

Experiencing God in my Life

          This past week I have probably experienced God in my life more then any other time or at least it has been awhile since I have noticed Him working in my life. I was going to write 3 entries about the three different things that happened to me this week but then I decided to put them all in one entry so it would be easier to follow along. I could also write them in one setting if I did it that way. God has been talking to me in a lot of ways this week. Three different ways is what I got to experience and I'm telling you this past week was only the second week of the "Experiencing God" Bible Study at my church. God is doing something if He is already trying to seek to me through different ways.
           The 1st time this week when I felt God speaking to me was from a song on the radio while I was on my way to work. The song "Just Be Held" was on there are it just took me back to my last job and when I was hoping to get one that I really liked and could make a difference with. I felt at peace when the song came on at that time this week because I knew through everything that has been going on that God was holding me and getting me through it. It was also funny because that is the song I played every morning on the iPad before the kids would come in at my last job. I felt like I was be held onto until a better job came along for me. God knew just at the right time when to bring the job I am at now to me and everything worked out and now I am at peace.
             I will tell you this: these 3 different situations felt like God was telling me that you can be a peace now. I (God) have everything under control, just live your life like you want to and I will take care of things. The 2nd time I felt like God was talking to me this week was when I was with a mentor and talking about my life and trying to get me hooked up with another mentor along the same stages as life for me. It was just a meeting to get to know me a little better so she knew how to match me up with someone else. I started talking to her about my high school days and my two favorite things which was FFA and Cross Country. Then we got to the subject about how I got into Cross Country and I told her the whole story and it has been awhile since I told someone that story.
           The story of how I was playing soccer when the cross country coach mentioned something about me being in Cross Country. At that soccer game, where I got hit/kicked in the nose with a soccer ball. Then going home and my parents telling me that the Cross Country coach said I would be great at running. Then it made me think about how the past 3 years my coach kept giving me the award for "Most Determined" and I will say I have to agree with that still to this day he was right. I didn't see that at those moments in time but now I got a glance at that again and it makes sense. It is a moment I have never forgot about and now it is a moment I still won't ever forget with a new meaning behind it. The coach saw something in me that I had no idea that I had and I lived it out in my high school years. I played 8th grade soccer when this happened so I had the whole summer to think about joining Cross Country.
               I'll admit there were some times I wanted to stop it altogether but my determination kept me at it just like my determination is keeping me at life right now. The 3rd situation was an answer to prayer that I just prayed this past Monday. I prayed "That God would just show me my friend, just to know that my friend was safe." Last night at church, God did that and I was okay with it. I felt more at peace after I saw my friend and him smiling around the church so it is good. I left church feeling like I got what I prayed for. I smiled at the end of church while walking out to my car and when I got home I just sat in peace and freedom. I felt like a burden was lifted off my shoulders. I knew my friend was safe and loving life so that is what I am going to leave it at. I did have a convo. with God when I got home and I felt at peace about everything.
              Now all I have to do is believe and keep my eyes looking for those little things more and more throughout my days. Yet at the same time, I will have to learn how to see if they line up with God's Will for me. I still need to get into the Word more and study it. God will start small and then keep getting bigger and bigger until He has us where He wants us. 

MO vs. South America

         I have to write this down so I'll never forget it. This is a little talk I had with one of my little boys yesterday about the way I talk. It will be a really short entry.

Little Boy: Miss Tiffney, where are you from?

Me: Missouri

Little Boy: That explains it.

Me: Why?

Little Boy: You know my mom and dad are from "South America" (my words, he said the state) and they have a hard time speaking sometime.

      
         

        This little boy is in 2nd grade and he can put together those two things. He is pretty smart and in a way compassionate.

I Purpose to Embrace......

"God's Reasons."

        I started a new thing for this year. It is an idea I got from a certain author. She gave the action word for each month and then we are suppose to come up with something to work on during that month. There were also prayer sheets too so we could prayer about it theoughout the month. The action word for last month was "Embrace". 

         I had to ask myself, "what did I want to embrace" and the answer came up as "God's Reasons". It was good for me because I would always remind myself that God had a reason for this and it would get me through the day. I would also change things throughout the month because I felt like God had a better reasoning for the other thing.

         Here are some examples that happened in my life, this month, that I needed to see God's reasoning. I looked at my friends' lives and see if I could see some reasoning in their lives that I could use in mine. I know that isn't a good thing to do either. I need to stop that and I'm working on that.

         The other example was a in my life. I reasoned between two Bible studies. I really wanted to take "Entrusted" by Beth Moore because it was just by her but there was another Bible study I wanted to take too. That Bible study was called "Experiencing God". I started taking the Beth Moore one and found out it wasn't what I needed. It was all about mentoring and I'm just not at that part of my life yet. I'm the one that needs to be mentored.

         The "Experiencing God" one was just want I need. I love it! It is all about having a closer relationship with God and right now that is what I need. I'm still building that true love relationship with Him. It is all about hearing Him speak to where I can follow Him to my calling. This was my big thing in January to go with my words. 

         That was January's word and I'm just now writing about it. That s why it is my 1st entry for February. I will admit, though, I need to do better this month with it.
         Happy Groundhog's Day! We have 6 more weeks of Winter. He saw his shadow.