God's Desire Above Mine

        Trying to find somewhere to write at times can be really hard espically when everywhere you go there is a wedding going on. I finally ended up on my apartment lawn. Anyways, have you ever read the book "Kisses from Katie"? I'm reading it for the second time with with a different view then the first time. The second time seems more possible for me. I could see myself in the story here in AR. I could write my own story. I could see God's Desire for me being fun! :)
         The first time I read the book I got back from Guatemala and excited about what the Lord could do with me there. At the same time all the things Katie went through I knew I would go through some sort of the same things. Was I ready for that and could I handle it? Of course the only orphans too that were on my mind was what most people think orphans are.  That is children overseas that do not have parents to live with.
          Well, now that I have worked in a children's shelter with abuse and neglected children for a year and a half I have a different view and idea. I can do what Katie is doing only here in the states. I can build up a home setting for some abused and neglected children. Learning a lot about the foster care system and what it is really like plus the DHS (department of human services) is not okay with me. I always thought those service took care of the children and in a way humanly possible they are but in other ways I think they can do better.
           I never thought I would hear the phase "bad foster homes" but I do more then I should. People can be so choosy on the child they want. I know everyone is human and there is sin in this world and sometimes I just have to let go and pray.  In a way, I could be doing my part too and my hearts desire now is to be an actual house parent and then maybe a single foster parent or make my own children's home. Own a big house, maybe one with 10 rooms, and take those many children in plus help them with other needs and get the community more involved.
            The problem I think espically where I live in AR where Wal Mart  is is that people are too focused on business and doesn't notice the problems around them. Doesn't notice the need. No one speaks out if you want to know you have to get on the inside and or educate yourself on the children. While wal mart is a sponsor of places like these, community needs to see the big problems. Churches need to see the children has a chance to reach out.
              It is a touchy subject but one thing I know for sure is that God did put me in the right place.  My mom always said, "there are children here in the states that need our help too" and that was coming from a teacher's point of view but now I understand it more a lot more. I will do everything in my heart's desire to help the children around me and will Love on them with everything that I have. I'll be a missionary in the States!