Light in the Dark Valley

       The sermon at my church this morning was amazing. They talked about how God sent His Son into a Dark world. They showed us with the lights by turning them off and on and everything. We don't think much about the lights we put up on our houses or trees but we should and this sermon got me thinking about it a new way. Lights around Christmas is to light up everything whether house or tree. God made a plan for us to be saved and to be the light for Him when Jesus went to Heaven.
         They metioned Matthew 5 where it says we are meant to be the light now for God because Jesus died on the cross. Jesus passed that job onto us. They also meationed a lot about the dark valley of death and that God came to light that path up too. I loved it when they said the people of faith had to cross that valley into the Light. God had a plan for us so we could do that. His Plan was talked about in the Old Testament but happened in the New testament. God already had it planned out for us to cross that dark valley. He knew that we were going to come across it in our lives.
           That got me thinking about where I am in my life right now. I've been talking about boundaries and planning and how I need to do those things are keep with it so my dream can happen whatever that may be. It is funny how it shows us in the Bible how to do that. How God did it for the perfect thing to happen for us. He planned it out and it happened. It took hard work and determination or it would for us at least but we can do it. God plans a lot of things out from forming the Earth to Jesus dieing on the cross for us so where do we get that we can just takes things and go with it without boundaries.
           I don't know Jesus at all but this is just a guess. Wouldn't it be neat to be like Him and have no boundaries at all? Well, I guess that would be wrong He had boundaries but they were God's boundaries not the world's. Not being held down by the law to do anything. Some boundaries are good and we need them to get us on the right path and keep us safe but they need to be God's boundaries for us. Just think if Jesus let the other kings control Him then he wouldn't be able to do half of the work He did. He knew His boundaries what He was able to show and not show and He followed them. He followed them to the dark valley of death but it was all worth it in the end. He had faith in His Father.  We might need to go through a dark valley of death to see what is on the other side for us. We might need to learn more and give up more but they should only draw us closer to God and then we can let our Light shine for Him on the other side.  That is how the people/man of faith came to be man of faith. They had some hard times but they put their hope and trust in God and went onwards.
             I might be going out on a limb here but dieing on the cross was His Purpose for His Life. He did everything to lead to that. I'm sure Jesus made some scarifices too like no home, only few close friends, no family, and much more I'm sure. We can't just go about our lives aimlessly and not do anything about it whether big or small there is always a purpose for us and it needs boundaries.
            I have a friend doing great at their job and I remember hanging out with or wanting to hang out with that friend during college and they would want to take everything as is or whenever they had time for it but I think now going through and making their dream come true they realize it is all in the planning and scarfices and boundaries made. Nothing happens when you just go with it.  That friend has learned a lot this past year and it shows in their job.  Their light for Christ does shine through everything they do and it is amazing to see. It just encourages me more and more to do what God wants me to do the way He wants me to do it. If that means setting boundaries so do it. It will all be worth it in the end someday! Right now, I want to be the Light for God! I want to shine for Him not for anyone or anything else!

God Sent Us This Snow For a Reason

       I know most of you are already reading my title and are like "you got to be kidding me about this." If you really stop and think about it though, He did and that reason was to slow down at this time of year. I feel like I am behind on my Christmas shopping and parties and everything else that has to do with Christmas but yet I spent this last week more then any other way caring like I should. Taking time for God like I should and it's not just through the present and it won't be this week either. I feel like I'm rushing to get things done but I shouldn't be. Yeah, I'm rushing to get the pysical things done but what about my spirit and God. Do I remember the true meaning of it and resting in that? Am I happy with that when all the present are gone and all I have is family and friends to go to?
        You know maybe it is harder on me this year too because I don't feel like we need the material things in life. I spent almost a year with children who don't have much and here we are at Christmas time buying more. Maybe I don't care to buy more nonsense things. I didn't even make a good Christmas list this year. It had mostly books and CDs on it. Guess what the books were about, children that have been abused or negeteled.
        God gave us this snow to make us slow down and think about the real meaning of Christmas in a world that is so busy today. Here we are going places and thinking about what to get others when really we should just slow down. The snow is God's sign to us saying, "Stay in and spend time with me." or in my case you will get sick. It could also be like I'm trying to make it to work but the drive is so long and slow and I feel like I waste time because I get there a half a hour early because the roads were better then I thought.
         Even though, I love my job and there is no place I would rather be. I really regret not staying in on some of those snow days and just enjoy time alone and with God. The snow is really beautiful when we take the time to see it for what it is with the sun beaming down and children playing in it. It is pure white like we are in Christ and therefore, no matter what we are doing we are pure in Him. It's strange because God has been teaching me boundaries and like I've said before this snow and job are helping me learn those but at the same time it is hard because I want and do care about the children but then there is my family and friends I don't want to forget about.
         It is crazy how people complained that we didn't get snow last year and now they are complaining that we are. It just goes to show you that we can't be happy with anything of this world. We want it one way or the other. I understand it can be dangerous trust me after going into a ditch this past week I know but that will never mess with my perspective of snow. I was safe and my car got a little dent in it and I know some people aren't that lucky or blessed but they don't have to be mean to everyone else. Maybe they should have slowed down both on the road and in life or one or the other.
         People complain about the snow when really we should look at it as God's way of telling us to slow down and take time for Him and His Gift.  Snow is really a gift at any time no matter what you have to do in it because no matter where you are it slows things down at least a little bit if not all the way.  I've always loved the snow and winter time. I've been and am a snow baby being born in December 7 days after winter starts.
         All I'm trying to say is just spend time with your family and friends this season remembering the true meaning of Christmas because at least you are blessed enough to have those things in your life. Even if it means that God has to send snow to make us spend time with them, let's enjoy it to the fullest.  This enterty might be a little too forwards but it has been what I've been thinking lately. I hope it makes sense too.

A Little "Side" Mission Trip

       Who knew that you could have a mission trip in your home state at your own job in a big snow storm? AR friends are going to kill me for saying this but I want this all winter. LOL! :) They know where I work though so they understand why. I would have to be able to go outside with the children though most of the time. :) That is where I have been the past 2 days and it has opened up my eyes so much. God knew what He was doing when He put everything in order for good. I had a hard week last week but this week just seems so much better and yet I started it off at work after having a good talk with a family member.
          It seems like I just needed to get a way from my apartment and people around me like sorry to say it but friends for awhile and have no way of talking for long for awhile. You don't know how hard something hits you until it hits you hard and then you are like duh! First off, I think my apartment is too small and has a lot of things in it. Second off, I think I do need to live with a friend sometime soon like by next August.
           After staying 3 days and 2 nights at my job, I feel like they are a family to me and that they do care about the children there or at least most of them. I loved to see how we are came together and worked as a team by one showing up when one couldn't get out because of the snow. How people were so willing to stay a week overnights or more to take shifts where need be. I got to know some people that I never saw because I worked or stayed with them and got to know the people I knew already better. It just seemed like a caring place. It reminds me of the daycare at my college and it is so good to be back at a place like that then I was almost a year ago from now. I wouldn't trade this job for anything else unless it was to start one like my own.
            To tell you all what I'm learning, I need to tell you the start of the story which was last week. A friend of mine was honest to me and told me what they needed to tell me but in a way it was hard for me to take in. I understood it and respected them for it but it was still hard in a way. I thought about it all week until I got to talk to a family member of mine and they helped me understand things a little better. They helped me understand that boundaries are more and have to do more then just with what we think they do (dating/guys). Boundaries have to do with dreams, jobs, friends, and even family. If you don't have the set amount of time to spend with them or the ability to say no when they ask you of something then your life is going to be crazy.
               I had that talk this past Sunday and after that I have spent the last 3 days at my job and I think that talk helped me see things a little clearer now. I heard the past two days at my job how people had to go home because of their families/husband/boyfriend and that is great and I don't think anything of it expect this. People think I might be strange because I work with the children I do and I love it and don't care to spend the night. I felt strange last night spending the night because everyone was going home or almost everyone and the roads were fine but I had to work in the morning so I stayed.
              I truly believe God gave these past 2 days to see that I don't need all the stuff I have to make me happy and I knew that from before mission trips. I think the main thing He was showing me the week before and this week was I don't need a guy in my life right now or a family because He has better things for me. If I had a family or boyfriend I wouldn't be able to stay over night at my work or go on these amazing mission trips. I might not even be able to open my own shelter or orphanage for children unless my husband really loves children like I do. I mean I can see myself opening one by myself if I have to having 12 children and just me in one big house. When I enjoy it, I have the energy to do it and nothing to keep me from it.
               Yes, I may be that  strange one spending the night somewhere else when I don't have to really but scared to drive in the snow and don't want to get up so early. I do the life I do because I don't have a boyfriend/husband or children to go home to. This is and will be my life for however long The Lord wants it to be. It will never wear out on me. To people who really know me, this shouldn't be surprising. I love my life right now and there is no other way I would have it now! Maybe later but not right now. I can't complain at all and I won't! :)

Big Snow and Me

      I thought I would write one about my first big snow storm that we are having here in AR right now. I'm learning a lot about life and the weather is not helping because it is just going right along with it teaching me the same thing. I have seen how my job now works with the snow and knowing me that is not good. I have been driving in this mess everyday but when you have children that need you, there is nothing else you can do. You can stay there and make it like a short mission trip but I haven't yet.
        This weather is also getting to me emaitonally because I'm stressed when my work calls and ask if I want to come in. I'm the kind of person that says, "yes" espically when it involves children and that could get you in touable sometimes. I was in a wreak on the way to work one day. It was just me hitting a little metal pole and bared wire and all I got was a dent in my car. It also was the first time that I drove in snow in AR because the last two years all I had to do to get to my 1st job here was walk because I lived that close to it so I could go in no matter what. It took me about at last 10 mins. to walk there. I would rather drive in the snow now to my work then to walk to work. All together it is my 1st big snow storm in AR. A lot of firsts here these past couple of days.
         It is neat to see the people you work with, your co-workers, really band together for the children at a time like this. They are saying I will stay a week at work or come back on the icy roads and help. If you stay over, you get to know them more and they become like family, I kind of hope it does another big storm like this before winter is over and then I will stay no matter what. You have to do this because it is just the nature of the job. It also helps you see who is there for the children and who is there for just the money because if you are there for the children you will either stay or come back if needed, I think.
          I get to work or see people that I never get to see or work with so I get to know more of who is in the other sections of the building. It is a very, spiecal place that I work and I couldn't ask for a better one even if I do get in one or two wreaks along the way. These past few days with work too has helped me to see if I made the right choice or not. To see if I'm listening and in a way trusting God, which I need help with badly. I've been making the right choices I think after that wreak. They always tell you that the storms of life will past you by and you will get through them.
         It was fun yesterday too though because we had a snow themed day without even knowing it or that is what the teacher in me calls it. I had them make snowman out of cotton balls and snowflakes around the snowman with their hands painted white. Another co-worker went outside to get snow from the playground and the children got to play inside with plates of snow. They made little snow mans and used rasins and marshmallows for eyes and buttons. Such a cute idea to keep them busy! :) That is one way of co-workers working together.
         It is funny because this natural storm fits my storm of life right now. Not listening to God or seeing the signs if I should go or not and not seeing the signs in my life whether to stop or to go in a different way. It was so good though yesterday after I got to work after the wreak. Three of my boys started to talk about God and Jesus as soon as I sat down to play with them. I was like that is strange, God. I crashed and then I come on in to work and here Your Name. I will write more about that experince later because something happened later on that night that was neat. That moment made my whole day and night better.
          I hope this make somewhat of some sense. I have gotten 6 hours of sleep in the past 2 days. I just wanted to try and explain what my job is like during snow days because it is really different. It is like a mission in the states. The people staying are the missionaries for those few days or week. I might stay at this place a little longer. :) Things might get tough but yet they are so fun and easy compared to other jobs.
      

Wisdom from Psalm 22:6-10

       We went over this in church last Sunday for the 1st week of Advent. The word or thought for this week is "Hope". We started in the old testament where David said and did almost the exact same things has Jesus did and said on the cross. The verses are Psalm 22:6-10 for today and I might give some more verses later on but this is all I had time to write about on Sunday.

"But I am a worm and not a man. I'm scorned and despised by all! Everyone who sees me mocks me. They sneer and shake their heads, saying, "Is this the one who relies on the Lord? Then let the Lord save him! If the Lord loves Him so much, let the Lord rescue Him!" Yet you brought me safely from my mother's womb and led me to trust you when I was a nursing infant. I was thrust upon you at my birth. You have been mu God from the moment I was born."-Psalm 22:6-10

         Here are my thoughts on these verses. Here is what I get from them and what the Lord is saying to me. I feel like the worm sometimes and not the man. I have felt like people have mocked me in a way that is jokely but still mocking because I buy and do things for the children I work with. When God was on the cross, it was then He saw the pain. It was then His eyes were really opened to every sin of the world. Every sin was on Him. Is what I'm doing really for the Lord? If I love the Lord I should let them mock me because I know what I'm doing is only bettering the childrens' lives. It's like I see the sin of this world and others mock me because I'm trying to show Christ to the children while I have the chance. God has brought me to Him since the start of my life. He let me safely to Him and taught me to trust Him at a young age. He has been my God from the moment I was born working my life together.
          I feel like He has also put me where he has wanted me while working with children whether elementary aged children or younger. Public school or daycares. He gave me the feeling of compassion for these children. Every since college, He has given me a passion to go on the mission field but having the sense to travel started much earlier at about the age of 10. He is still giving me the steps everyday to follow Him to make my traveling dreams come true. I'm learning more and experiences more each day and that is what it is all about.
          I might have to have a spiecal entery sometimes in Jan. about what the Lord has done in my life this past year because everything really does add up and I can see where the Lord is leading me but not quite where yet. Look for that entery coming next month. :)

A Little Boy's Vivd Dream

        I had this story that happened at work and I just had to tell it to someone. It might be short because I have to hurry but I knew if I didn't write it down I would forget it later. A lot has been going on that I need to write down on here. Hopefully, I will get caught up when I get snowed in. This talk with this little boy started the night before and I just wanted to see what kind of morning he had after he woke up for the morning.
         This little boy, as I was putting him to sleep, was telling me that he was sacred and kept seeing a monster when he was closing his eyes so he couldn't go to sleep. That monster seemed to be Harry Potter with a knife. Now, I have never watched those movies because I know they would scare me too. I don't know if this is true or not. He also said that he was made to watch them because someone else watched them. I just kept reminding him that he was safe and I will stay by his bedside until he fell asleep and I did.
           The next day is what really got me though. I asked him how his night went after all of that and he said the greatest thing ever, he said, " I'm happy now because I saw angels and God." I asked him some few more questions about what happened before that. He said things like "I was in hell and saw the devil because I was mad at someone but then I saw the angels and God and now I am happy." I'm not for sure who the someone was but it is just amazing how a little child can put two and two together.
When you think about the devil, you are usually mad or sinning or both really. When you see angels and God, you are happy.
            It's comments like these and dreams that makes me wonder do children really see more then we give them credit for. Does God really give them dreams like that where only they can see Him? It was scary for me but at the same time interesting because I wonder did he really see this and put the feelings together or is it something he has just heard or saw. Either way it is in his mind and he is dreaming it, which is not good when it is about the devil but I think it is neat that God and angels came over to keep him safe espically after I told him he would be safe.  Just another one of those God moment.
            It is strange too because during the day this child can get really mean and bossy like he is hiding something or something is bothering him but he doesn't know how to explain it yet we are not giving him the chance to in his own words. He loves playing naijas, bad vs. good, and other games like that outside and sometimes now I wonder if that is not a way to get his feelings out.

Ideas for Yo-Yo Teddy Bears

     Here are my ideas for the kinds of yo-yo teddy bears I'm going to start making and maybe once I get enough teddy bears sold I will start making other things like hair pieces, blankets, and wreaths.

-Brown just because I found brown patterns I liked for the 1st one

-Pink and maybe Hello Kitty for little girls-thinking of making one for my niece

-Disney Princesses for little girls

-Black and Lime Green

-Baby Blue for little boys

-Pale yellow or green for any gender of baby

-John Deere colors (yellow and green)

-Camo and maybe orange

-Red and white for the Razorbacks

-Maybe yellow and black for MIZZOU

-Any Holiday/Seasonal ones

-When I get really good, I will take suggestions. I could and wouldn't mind any suggestions right now but they won't be made just for a person right now. I'm hoping to get to that spot though and sell them to raise money for some kind of mission trip or traveling overseas for sometime longer then a week, maybe a year is my goal/dream. There are so many kinds to make because there is no certain way to do it. Just have to make myself focus on making them more and spending more time on them then I do now. It has taken me 4 months to make one, I think and still not done with it. Hopefully, in the next 2 or 3 months I will be though.