Mind Relaxing Day

        Today was the most mind relaxing day I have had in, probably, over 2 years, which is strange because I probably had the hardest thing happen to me today as well. I won't go into the details about the hardest thing because I don't want people to know about it. Let's just say I had to find something out the hard way and I don't appreciate that at all. That is only one thing, even though, I have to deal with and think about it for the next few days. I was trying to forget about it and move on but I can't let it go.
       It was a strange relaxing day and I call it mind relaxing because I did two things on that same day that I haven't done in awhile. Those two things were that I started counseling again and I am not scared to admit that. I also had yoga again tonight and this is my first week where I went to yoga 2 times a week and that is how many times that have it during the week. I had one in the morning and the other in the evening so between the two, I took a hour to hour and a half nap because I just didn't want to think about the bad thing that happened today.
       I did have a moment before I went into where I was going that I just had to do because I had to make my day fun somehow. Let's just say I honked my horn for the fun of it today while driving down the road.  Probably the funniest thing I did all day today, which is sad but you have to make some kind of fun when you are bored and mad. Anyways, back to my mind relaxing day. First, let's talk about counseling some. I won't write all the details but I will say that I liked it a lot and it is what I have been looking for since I moved here and was interested in counseling.
       I am going to a Christian counseling place and of course they ask you if you want to use God as part of your counseling. They do both kinds. I said "yes" and my counselor did use it while we were talking and even gave me some devos. to read that she found and other Christian things that I can do to calm me down. I'll give it a little more sessions until I really write about it on here if I do. Right now, that is a big life changing and self-care for me that I need to do and why not do it now when I have nothing else to do, right?
        Then I really didn't want to leave yoga tonight. I just wanted to lay down on the floor all night without moving. I started something new for myself during yoga. You know how they tell you to breath and think certain thoughts? Well, I usually just breath and focus on that which is something you need to do during yoga. While we were sitting the start and just calming our minds, I was thinking and saying the words, "Jesus", "Jesus, I trust you", "I trust you with my mind, body, and should", and also "I trust you with my future". I got the idea from a friend earlier this morning. The leader of yoga says at the start, "Forget about the past", "don't think about the future", "don't think about what you have to do after this class or what you did before it" and I replaced those sayings with sayings that had to do with Jesus and Trusting Him.
          I want to make that a habit every time I go so when and if I do it by myself at home, once I get good or at least all the poses down, I can say that out loud in my home. I was also thinking about saying some verses, either summarizing some or pick short verses and just repeat those in my head too. I have a few that I could start with right now. It is just strange how each person as to find their own way through life but it is a good thing too. God made each one of us special and I think that is also something I am learning too. I am bad at comparing myself with my friends or the people around me and that just makes me more confused and upset.
           Sometimes we even have so high of standards in a family setting that we won't know growing up but once we are out in the "real" world we can realize maybe we weren't made for what we thought or the family thought we were made for. If you have that thought, it is hard to change especially if you are a people pleaser. There is so much emotion that goes with that especially when you can't put the words to go with it because it is something new you have experience or seen. We could and do have all these people around us and trying to encourage us, which is great but as one person, we need to realize that we are different and need to take our problems and even our good things to God.
           God is the only one that truly knows how we feel. Most of the time, He knows how we feel and what is best for us better then we do. If you think about it that way, then why do we go to other people for advice. Suggestions and help is nice to get every once in awhile but we need to remember as children of God that we need to bring those suggestions and little pieces of advice back to Him and see where He stands on them and if they fit the plan He has for us. No one knows us better to God, Himself, not even our family and sometimes there comes a point in life where we have to realize that and then trust God with everything.
            Wow! All of these thoughts on my mind relaxing day but yet I didn't feel stressed about any of these thoughts. If you read this, it wouldn't look like a mind relaxing day to you but it was in a good way. You know why? Because they are all truth and it is something I need to work on. I'm just learning more and more about myself and maybe that is what I need during this season of my life. No matter what, though, I know I have people beside that will help when I ask. I just need to feel comfortable asking and not be so stubborn at times.

Challenge: "God wants us to bring every little bit of advice to Him so we can see what He has to say about it. He loves to help His Children through anything."