Why Go Through All The Drama?

         I was talking to a friend this past month about things. Mainly about her crush and how she shouldn't have one because of all the drama. It was just too much for her to handle and all the mixed messages that were going back and forth but then she said something that really got me thinking. She asked the question, "Why go through all the drama?" For me, I have never had a real boyfriend and that mainly because I am stubborn and sassy and independent but I have had my share of crushes.
         Some other people might want to add on to the list and that is fine with me but what I am saying is "why didn't I think of that question too?" It would have saved me a lot of pain from the past to the present if I thought of things that way. I think that having a crush is more drama then having a really boyfriend because you get your hopes up too high and then they are crushed by a person that you might have cared about. It is this whole thing with keeping your heart safe and guarded.
          My friend came up with this question when I was going through a hard situation and thinking back on it now, I think to myself that I couldn't have all the drama that goes on with the dating picture and/or having a boyfriend. Now that mean I wouldn't ever date but while I am not in it or don't have to be why do I get worked up about certain situations. Why not enjoy the single life while I still have some left for me? It is strange that I thought of that and the ideas and reasons that I came up with when I was thinking about the question. I will tell you them now.
          Why go through all the drama?
One: I am already hard enough on myself so I don't need someone else to be harder on me. I need someone who will encourage me and lift me up.
Two: I am happy with the way my life is going now even though there are days that I wished for someone in my life but I wouldn't give now up for just anything.
Three: I don't want to be too focused on a guy that I miss growing up as a good person and women.
Four: For me, it would bring me down a lot more then crushes do, sadly, and my world would be totally torn apart and I don't want to give any human the ability to do that.
Five: Just thinking about the dating picture makes me scared. I don't know why but it does.
Six: I am a very sensitive person when it comes to trusting someone like that and letting them in on my life.
           All this to say and decide that if I don't even have a thought about marrying the guy, then I am not going to waste my time on him. I can't live my life with all that drama. My personality can't handle it. God didn't make me strong enough. Now I might try to do it one or two times because like I said I never have dated so just to see how I would handle it but I get to know enough about people by just being friends with them.
          I can tell right from the start if they are my type and I am also the kind of person who likes to get straight to the point so if you don't see it going anywhere, you can tell me right off the back. I have had that done to me more times then I can count. I'm not up for any of the small talk and for me to see if I trust a guy takes a long time too. There might be times that I try to do small talk so I can tell but it doesn't take me long to see if a guy is not interested if I'm not interested. Now if it is the other way around, that is a whole other story. It is strange to write this because I know most people are always in the dating picture but for some reason, I think God took that part out of me or just making me stronger before it does come my time.
           It is like God is making sure I know who I am in Him so I won't be so hurt when my time comes if it ever does. God knows what is best for me and what I can and cannot handle at certain times in my life. I've grown so much in Him I just couldn't see myself dating and making it in high school now that I look back. I couldn't even see myself dating in college and that was only 5 years ago. I might not quite understand what God is doing now or in the future but I do know that He is watching out for me. That is all I need to know right now.
         Why go through all the drama when I know that I have God's Love with me no matter where I am going or what I do. I know He will always forgive and forget. I am always beautiful and lovely in His Eyes. I am always is little girl and princess no matter my age.