Dreams About Listening

          Let's see if I can write this one pretty fast since I have somewhere to be in a little while. I want to get it out though because I forget about it and the dreams that I have been having this past week. Usually I am not that big of a dreamer and if I do dream I just shove them off because I almost forget right away when I wake up. I am the type of person where I feel like I am somewhere else and doing something else but can't remember when I wake up. I have had two dreams this week that really stuck out to me and I am wondering why.
          Like I said I only remember where I was and what I was doing. There are no words or actions yet. Early this week like Monday or Tuesday night I had a dream to where I felt like I was just sitting and talking with someone. I want to say that that someone was my grandma, which is really special because she is gone and it will be a year in August since she passed away. I feel like it was her too because she is a wise women and I just need that with everything going on right now in my life. Like I said, though, I am not for sure, it could just be something I made up.
         I am also a person when I feel like I am in a strange or different place even if it is a dream I wake up right away. I don't know why I do that but I do. Sometimes they could feel too real and I have had those dreams in the past and they have been scary ones but this week they have just been sitting down and talking and listening ones. The one I had last night or early this morning was another one where I was just sitting and listening. This time, though, I felt like I was in a group of people. Maybe in a strange way God is showing me what to do because I know I have some groups to pick from and I wanted to talk to a family member about what was going on and I did.
         At the same time, I wish I could hear in my dreams and maybe that is the next part. I want to hear what I was listening to and talking about. I have also thought these past couple of weeks about talking to a friend about what was going on and just getting things straighten out so we could be friends again. Maybe that dream will come later down the road when we are all cooled off about things and when the time is right? It has just been a lot of talking and listening for me lately and I don't know why. I would and do even listen to my co-workers at work talk about things going on in their lives but yet I can't talk about my life to them.
          A lot of it could be God showing me too that I need to take the time and listen and talk to him when things get out of hand too. I mean these dreams could mean so much right now because my life is just like that. I would think it was neat if I keep having these dreams but they only get more real with words and wisdom and direction like I need and pray for me. It could be a way that God is speaking to me since He can only get ahold of me when I am a sleep. I know that is sad but it is true. I also noticed that those couple of nights were when I didn't take the time to pray. Like last night, I got home later after hanging with some friends so I didn't pray but instead I had that dream.
          Like last night's dream was listening to a group of people, I know some older friends have been praying about if I should join a certain Bible study so that might be an answer to that somehow too. I know that I need to be praying about it too but other things have came up that I need to pray about in my own life that no one really knows about like my feelings. It is just strange how God can get to you and get your attention even if it is through dreams too. Right now, that might have to be how God speaks to me because I really don't have that many friends in the same stage of life that I am in now to where they can just go hang out anytime and talk about anything other then marriage or children.
          I have felt more alone then ever lately because it just seems like everyone has a boyfriend or girlfriend or getting married or having children. Then for me, it just seems like everything is going the opposite way. My guy friends are not talking to me. They could care less about me. All I do every day is talk to children. Why would I want to talk about them? I just feel like I have a different life and I haven't found anyone but maybe a few people that are in the same stage as me.
         I mean my Bible studies are with older people like my mom's age, which there is nothing wrong with that because they have a lot of wisdom for me and oddly enough they have been through the same things it seems like. It just seems strange that I have that mind set now but I am only 28 years old and I should be living like the other 28 years old but I want so much more and I am so much wiser. It is like I am wiser then my age but no one can really see that because they don't really talk to me that much.
         I got off topic about my dreams there and onto another rant but hopefully you get the idea. A lot is going on in my life and I do just need to listen and talk even if it is in my sleep some nights. It might make me get up earlier then I want to like it did this morning but it is worth it because I got to write an entry. Something that I love to do in my spare time and that might seem a little strange to some people too but it is how I share my thoughts the best.